Maya and Karim were inseparable. They were just one of those couples that we were sure would never break up. And then without warning- they break up and he gets engaged, to a girl from his own religion.
Typical right? Maya the Christian girl from Jbeil and Karim the Muslim guy from Beirut. We’ve all heard this story many many times. But when it happens to one of your closest friends, you really start to rethink things.
He called her his “wifey” all the time. Not once- would you ever look at these two and think they’re “different”- because, well, they just weren’t. I wouldn’t say they practiced religion, but occasionally Maya would go to a mass with her parents and Karim would fast a few days in Ramadan.
They’re relationship was an intimate one. Both couple’s parents knew about it. There were rumors that Maya’s parents weren’t exactly happy, but they knew they couldn’t do anything about it. Karim’s parents on the other hand, always welcomed Maya, and Maya felt right at home with them.
After 4 years going strong, they both wanted more. So they decided they would do what any interfaith Lebanese couple would have to do, a civil marriage in Cyprus. That’s when things started to go wrong. Maya’s mother was heartbroken; she vowed that Maya would “regret” never walking down the aisle. Karim’s parents seemed OK with it all, until they mentioned a small religious ceremony (Katb Al Kitab) upon the couple’s return from Cyprus. “Just for formalities” his dad kept saying.
And that’s when shit hit the fan. Maya felt betrayed that Karim had bought into his dad’s suggestion. When Maya’s parents got word of this, they freaked out. And with communication down the drain, the couple took some “time-off.” One minute we’re shopping for a “silky simple off-white dress” the next Maya’s lying on her bedroom floor crying her heart out.
The girls and I kept trying to explain to Maya that all this shouldn’t matter, what matters is that she loves Karim and they should do what they have to do to make it work. My boyfriend called me such a hopeless romantic, “things don’t work that way”, he kept saying.
Indeed they don’t. Karim felt just as betrayed that Maya wouldn’t do such a “small formality” to be with him. Both parents convinced them they were better off without each other. And today, a month later, Kairm’s Facebook status changed to “Engaged.”
For once, I’m completely out of words. Bisoux
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Great post, but damn that’s one fucked up story.
They got married in CYPRUS, meaning all the family and religious traditions & formalities should NOT happen anymore…So I understand why she was upset from him.
A month later he’s engaged?!?!?!?! She should actually be grateful he’s on to the next one.
I wonder who funds this propaganda website promoting musilm fairytale weddings
It’s all to do with women who assume that it’s their choice, but they don’t factor in that the other party doesn’t respect autonomous culture. They abuse it to there advantage & manipulate them thinking all will be good. It’s Saudi money & oil that promotes this Love Jihad. That’s what it is & no one can deny it. Unfortunately their are good Muslims out their who’ve been brainwashed to such an extreme & live in denial + fear of culture, family & religion.
i’m heartbroken just reading this…
i’m in more or less the same boat as Maya and Karim…
i refuse to think of what will come when we decide the tie the knot.
i have a friend who went thru the exact same thing, the guy got a divorce 1 year later, because he realized he was living a lie and wanted the girl too much to live with sumone else!
I went through the exact same thing. My parents were supportive all the way through, then when things got serious they started creating obstacles. So did his parents. We ended it. It still hurts very much. It pisses me off that the war generation is still putting obstacles for intermarriage. They should be begging our generation for forgiveness for ruining the country and leaving us with crap.
This is something happening in Lebanon and it’s really unfair!
And i can’t say that Karim is bad, cos we don’t know what happened with his family, maybe they obliged him to marry someone from his religion!! that’s why he’s engaged!
I wish things aren’t this complicated, coz even if they got married in Cyprus, when they come back & want to have children, they’ll be on the dad’s name & they’ll be Muslim!!
It’s not that i have a problem with that, but did they think of it? Did MAYA think of it?? can she accept this fact since she go to church from time to time?!?!
And what will be the case of the children, will they be lost? ??what would they want to be, like MOM or like DAD??
These are all questions with no answers……. which make us question marriage??
oh wow! It’s such a shame when things like that cld come between two people. Society is cruel that way. Problem is, you can not alianate your family.
Things went out of hand and too many people butted in!
I know i am not in their shoes, but all of my past relations were with someone of another religion. I would have kept to myself and eloped. A marriage is just a formality it’s what happens next tht matters. Families wld have come around eventually.
My khalo got married in cyprus. Hatton bel amer el we2e3 as they say and now they’re peacfully happy. Sadly and unfortunetly in the arab world, not all have tht luxury and society is too suffocating!
Story of my life!! The only difference is that my relationship lasted 10 whole years. It’s been one year and a half and it still hurts like the first day. I am still completely broken. My parents were not that happy but they loved my Karim. His parents loved me too but were always kind of bothered when the cross I wear used to show but these were little details, it all seemed just fine until he decided that it is better if I get married to someone of my own religion, and he would do the same, simply for procreation, that he will love me more than his future wife but that this is better for both of us. I still can’t believe it after one year and a half of the break up, I still can’t believe that the graduate educated open-minded man of my life is saying such stupid things. For 10 years, things were just great, no differences could be felt, we were on the same level concerning everything, how to raise our children, everything, I even said I have no problem if my children are muslim or christian, I will worship them no matter what they are. I know his mother played a big role in the break up but I am still in great disbelief. I gave my whole life to this man that I still love, yes unfortunately, I am still in love with him, but hey what can I do? nothing… except say to myself it is probably for my best. Oh and it is probably for my best, the only thing we never agreed upon was that if we had a child who is gay, he would just never accept him, that is the only thing that used to scare me a bit, I would accept my children no matter what they are. But still 10 years people, and he just left. I must have whined a lot here, but being out of words Ivy is very normal, oh yes so normal.
Stop assuming that things would’ve been different. Just reading your post alerts many red flags. 10 years. Your were a mattress baby. Stop kidding yourself & living a lie to assume things were a fairy tale. When the signs & signals are there, you chose to ignore them, hoping love would endure & overcome these issues or factors. But you forget. When you love someone, your better not going down the road & wasting the girls time if you know fully well religion is an issue. It works with celebrities Interfaith marriages because there name is in media. So Muslims cannot show open discrimination or it will make there belief system look bad. So for public relations they make it work. But when you know their are battles & issues to face stop kidding yourself. Youse your head not your heart. He kept you hanging cause the sexual desire. His family had an issue with your cross simple fanatics. You were kidding yourself baby. Learn to accept reality, I’m happy to see Interfaith & Intercultural & Interracial marriages. But when Quran calls Christians Apes & Pigs openly & tells you to subjugate them @ will. Then your fantasy is a lie & you were heading down a spiral of disaster. Dead End Road. He should’ve done the right thing & told you we cannot work not because of our feelings together because of circumstances we face for one another. I would like to hear of a Muslim Girl marrying a Lebanese Christian man. Then it will show you what the Muslim agenda is. Your not dealing with normal human beings here. They’re totally controlled & ordered by their religion to dislike Christians @ any cost. It’s not the same if you married a Hindu or Buddhist man. There Religion controls their life.
Wow, you’re very intolerant of Islam and Muslims. I am a Muslim and have never heard or read about Christians being perceived as ‘Apes and pigs’.
I am very offended by your brainwashed version of what Islam is.
Sorry you’re so backward.
Aisha
Yes Aisha let’s see how you react when your own sister wanted to marry a non muslim & you obviously don’t know your Koran or your deliberately misleading to give Islam a peaceful & beautiful cover. It’s nothing more than a system that subjecates people to there beliefs by enforcing Halal & other Islamic life style decisions on others & this causes them to embrace Islam because it’s so in your face.
wow, this is so sad…
For me, it doesnt matter so much, no matter the label we put on things and people. And to read the comments is also heartbreaking. Not for the fact that its a “story of romance” but a matter of labeling and social conditioning that is so not for our times anymore. This was so 50 years ago!
I have no idea how we’re gonna move beyond this label thing in this country and become civil as it should be…
As a person who (proudly) had a civil marriage, to a very beautiful woman from a different “Lebanese label”, in other terms, “religion”, I think I can totally understand what Maya and Karim went through.
There comes a time in such relationships where fear is stronger than love, and in this case, fear means family. My wife and I have passed through the exact same stage as Maya and Karim, both of our parents wanted us to do things their way, even though we were together for 2 years before taking things to the next level. But instead of listening to them, we decided to strongly oppose and tell them what we think and how we want things to be done, eventually they accepted, and we spent an amazing time in Cyprus.
Because of that, several family members did not show up to our wedding, good riddance to that, I’m married to a gorgeous person, and our religious status was never going to stand in our way.
well i don;t want to sound harsh but he’s an idiot! and in Lebanon it seems that we’r open for both religions but that’s just on the surface, we’r actually no different then any other arab country!
i mean if he loved her so much and they were inseparable etc… why the heck would he succumb to his parents’ wishes for “just a formality” when he’s like ohhh i love her i don’t care what my family says …. well it turns out it’s all a lie and he actually does care; and it doesn’t matter what problems he has in his family it’s really not his place to do that to her! what would he have done if the girl’s family asked her to get married in a church u know “just a formality” he would have went running for the hills!!!
and getting engaged to someone else after a while well that’s a very low LOW!! i mean at least have the dignity to wait a bit more!!! well in the end it’s for the girl’s favor she got out before it was too late then it already was! coz apparently he wasn’t the man she thought he was! and he was awfully good at hiding his cowardness!!!
Maya will find someone much better and he will treat her just perfectly! just let her hang in there! and at least he will be a REAL MAN, not someone who’s just pretending…!
I dont understand something… I mean I never asked but why don’t we have Civil Marriage in Lebanon?? what’s preventing it from happening?
I mean we have 18 sects!!! didnt anyone think that someone is gonna like someone else from another sect.. I mean come on ..
I will get married Civil even if my future wife is from the same religion:
a- I am not religious
b- Lebanon is a very Secterian nation, me no like.
c- my kids should have the freedom to choose.
d- Me No LIKE.
When we were getting married in Cyprus, I asked our friendly Cypriot driver “How many Lebanese couple do you marry everyday?” He said “I usually handle 1 couple a day, but sometimes he manages to handle 2. (a good friend of mine did a report in Gulf News on the <a href="http://gulfnews.com/business/features/wedding-trade-thrives-in-cyprus-1.628564" title="civil marriage business in Cyprus")
The issue in Lebanon is about power, if everyone had a civil marriage, religious leaders will lose their job (and a lot of money) as an entity that hovers over you until you die. For example, I have absolutely no religious connection whatsoever, I had a civil marriage, and I don't need anything from religious employees, so imagine if 3 million people did the same thing. They make it as hard as possible to choose option 2, when option 1 is just around the corner.
shou hal Mafia in Lebanon ! they really know how to control people, money, even ideas…
but I know a lot of people who are against Civil marriage. some Muslims say it’s 7aram and “God” (with all due respect to other ppl’s feeling) will not like it, some Christians say that it’s a heavenly bond that should be done properly and under supervision of the church. I mean it’s not only religious figures that oppose it, it’s also a bit social.
some ppl are big “fans” (again with all due respect) of their religion that they will no tolerate something else.
they case of the guy’s parents in this story, this small detail messed up the whole thing, for me and you it’s a stupid detail, for the parents it’s the end of world if it’s not done.
I think it’s deeper than just leaders. but yeah Leaders making money out of it makes a lot of sense too. great Link.
I cannot edit my previous reply, here’s the correct article link:
http://gulfnews.com/business/features/wedding-trade-thrives-in-cyprus-1.628564
I don’t judge whatever people want to do with their life, but they shouldn’t say “we cannot have civil marriage in Lebanon because it’s haram”, if so, what about alcohol? Prostitution? Porn website? etc? People should be free to take their own decisions.
By the way, the dude in the video is me 🙂
I’m greek orthodox and 21, my boyfriend is 25 and muslim sunni. Ive been seeing him since I was 17 – he used to always say he couldn’t be with me because of my religion, but after about a year he said it didn’t matter to him anymore and we’ve been together ever since – His sister loves me, but even she raises her concerns that both our parents will never except it – his family is extremely religious and my family don’t know about his faith because they’re extremely strict about it themselves.
We are talking about marriage, but after reading this I am worried if it is all going to be too hard and he will leave me, since he has raised his concerns before about religion
I’m not from lebanon, however his parents are, and still carry the values in Sydney Australia.
Any thoughts?
and in my opinion love is surely stringer then fear! and if ur truly in love u won;t fear anything or anyone! if they don;t like what they see even parents well it’s their loss and their perspective! 2abna2oukoum laysou lakoum!!! come on ppl live ur lives fear free!!!! else u will never be happy for one second!!! ur parents lived their lives and if their lives were screwed up well what does it have to do with u! u have ur own brain and thoughts just be YOU!they raise u up but eventually u fly off on ur own!! i mean don’t they have faith or trust in their own raising of their own kids!!!! why have kids in the first place if ur gona make their lives miserable and dictate their lives for them!
ppl just break free from ur parents and if they get sad or whatever well they will deal with it eventually and of they don’t well the heck with them they don;t even deserve to be ur parents!!!!
Peace peeps!!
While this is sad… I don’t think theres anything wrong with the formalities that both parents want. What’s wrong with civil marriage and then marrying in church and doing a katb ktab– it is after all a formality, a part of tradition- if they both really wanted to be with each other they wouldn’t just done whatever it was needed to make their parents happy and still be together.
As for Karim moving on- after love failed, I guess he went the traditional route… many guys do that. Sorry Maya has to suffer from that though.
Karim would never have married in church ceremony for Maya. He wanted Katb Ktab, for his side of the family, why so the children can only be raised under islamic teachings. If he was fair and reasonoble and knew religion would play an integral role, then he should’ve never continued down a road for Maya to be hurt. So stop assuming or its only formal and it means nothing. You need to understand the Islamic mind set in relation to dominance, why are there only Muslim male and Christian Female interfaith marriages on this site. What does that say about Christian women in Lebanon, it speaks volume to choice and freedom, the muslim male takes advantage to further islams cause of dominance. That’s the simple truth.
this is so sad,
the sorrow of a broken heart is so deep,
but please focus on the real problem here, it’s the wicked Lebanese mentality which sees the other human in terms of his sect not the person itself, I hear all the time things like “dirze bala deen” or “marouni kalb” etc sectarianism is so strong and it’s like a cancer in our society.
My friend’s parents here in the US, were freaking out because they’re kooreans and she wants to marry a black man. There’s alot of difference between those cultures. But Lebanese muslims and christians both have the same tradition, culture, habits, goals etc and we still hate each other
Lebanese should stop thinking that weddings, engagement, are made for the family… Its a union between 2 people. Everyone else shouldn’t matter. I personally would blame Maya & Karim if they couldn’t make this relationship work… Very Sad…
I’m reading this and can’t stop thinking as to WHY nobody is putting the blame on someone…or something : Religion.
It’s about time lebanese grow up and realize that religion is fu**ing up their lives ! it’s because of religion that lebanon is so divised and now it’s because of religion that love ends up forbidden. Now , there’s a laic pride this week end…who is going ? very few I guess… Why why why ?
This is very sad. Actually it is so typical of interfaith marriages. My dad is Sunni and my mom is Druze – so her family had the hardest time accepting any of it, but like you said Ivy, there is nothing they could do.
But this is the awesome part- I am a Muslim man… I mean i fast, i dont technically pray on a daily basis – but hey, I am a “believer”. My girlfriend is a Maronite Catholic – and a very very religious one to that. So we’ve been together for quite some time now, and event hough we are young in terms of marriage, we are very VERY serious about each other, and I guess you can say we talk quite a bit about marriage and getting engaged and all that. So one day we were talking, and she asked what kind of marriage would we do?
I came up with a simple answer – one that many people do not think of – and let’s say it worked. I mean I would like to “iktob ktabeh” because my parents would love it if i did, and she would love to walk down the isle. So we will do both. I men she doesn’t have to convert to Islam in order to marry me – Islamically as a christian she is a believer of one God and all that shnaz so what the heck. I always liked the church idea – so we could do that symbolically for her. Its not a big deal.
But then again Ivy – both our families are encouraging and even welcoming of us being together. So maybe that plays a big role. I mean she went out with my cousins one days o she can get to know them and you know how girls are. She came back and she was crying… so i thought someone must have said something to her and all that – So i got all worked up. But she was crying because she was “happy”. As it turns out she was wearing a cross and she had hidden it under her shirt. So my cousin told her “don’t hide it! wear it and show it off, there is nothing to be ashamed of! We don’t care what your faith is – so show your cross when your with us, we dont get offended!” That helps you know… i mean… acceptance makes all the difference!
Such a sad story of Maya and Karim 🙁
I’m greek orthodox and 21, my boyfriend is 25 and muslim sunni. Ive been seeing him since I was 17 – he used to always say he couldn’t be with me because of my religion, but after about a year he said it didn’t matter to him anymore and we’ve been together ever since – His sister loves me, but even she raises her concerns that both our parents will never except it – his family is extremely religious and my family don’t know about his faith because they’re extremely strict about it themselves.
We are talking about marriage, but after reading this I am worried if it is all going to be too hard and he will leave me, since he has raised his concerns before about religion 🙁
I’m not from lebanon, however his parents are, and still carry the values in Sydney Australia.
Any thoughts?
Are you greek? If so you will betray every single one of your ancestors if you marry him, they fought 400 years to stay free of the muslim yolk and yet you are considering marrying into an extremely religious muslim family. he shouldn’t have been the one to tell you he couldn’t be with you because of Your religionYOU Should of told him. Drop him and find someone else whose religion isn’t going to make your ancestors turn in their graves and make him thinking the value of you and any daughters is less than him and every other male on the planet.
Im a christian and my love is muslim, we were best friends for 3 years, i used to help him with his relationships and he used to console me after my break ups… And then we fell in love, it’s been 6 months now tht we’re together and our love is deep 🙁 we can’t live without each other , his family lives in batroun,his friends r christians, he’s not so religious and im not too, his parents loved me and my parents like him but my mom and my 5alto r always trying to be against me ,they r worried abt our future together ( he can marry 4 , he can divorce easily, its a different way of living , etc) :s but if we rly love each other and talk abt everything b4 marriage we can both sacrifice and live happily , right ??
Basically, he used her as a slut. He knew perfectly well that nothing could come out of it, unless she converted to his religion. So he made her feel such a princess & all, awaiting that moment whereby most women would give towards the man. But she knew the repercussions as her family direct & indirect would rubbish her if she took that decision. That’s why he prolonged it initially. His family were welcoming for a hidden motive cause that was there intention. Make out her Christian family are not excepting from surface. It’s all lies. Christians act in this fashion especially in the middle east for survival. Cause throughout history Muslims married within Christian families, initially out of love & they realised that it was one of the tools of deception. Once they had done that, they alienated her from the family, stopped her from practising her religion. It’s a very deep reasons & I cannot go through all the historical analysis here. So that’s basically what they were attempting to forge in her mind. The man eventually realised the reality cause it couldn’t happen unless she accepted his life with no exception. So he just realised the sex was really good to miss on, so he continued to fill her head with words she wanted to hear. So he was benefiting both ways. It was a carefully orchestrated & calculated move on his part. He then realised he needed to get married. So he utilised Katb AlKitab excuse to end it. He & the family had this carefully planned & auctioned it with perfect timing. When they knew the conditions were favourable & she wasn’t being receptive to their wolf in sheep clothing advances, they tossed her out in the rubbish bin. She is scared now cause she is useless to any Christian man in the future as she had a physical relationship with a Muslim. Her only hope is to hide her past. She is to blame, cause the signs were there in actions, words & behaviour. She liked the physical loving so much that it was hard to escape the physical pleasures & desires. But she wanted it as well to fall in her conditions, that was true love & acceptance. But reading this it was the otherwise. Accept reality your not a western Christian whereby you can easily convert symbolically. Your in the middle east. You should’ve been more aware. Him being religious proved that alone. In Islam it’s ok to have sex with a person who is an unbeliever & it’s no sin. Look @ there whole islamic religion theology & teachings. There you go reality hurts. There was no real love. There might have been love initially to spark things, but it was all doomed to begin with. The time factor proves what I’m pointing out alone.
Seriously? You MUST be kidding me
No babe read articles on Culture & Love Jihad. It hurts when people like to live in oblivion. I’m all for inter-faith dialogue, marriage & everything it can provide. But when your dealing with Islam it’s not the case. Yes famous Christian Arab women who’ve married men of Islamic faith, can do so cause the conditions & environment permit. I just know that Islam can never allow a male to live a normal life, as there religion dictates everything that they must do or they receive the rath of Allah. You don’t want to know its what happens, family & cultural pressure is the reason. I am telling you this that you’ve got to understand that religion plays an important role in their life & it’s got superiority complex issue. It believes it’s the best alone from all others. Muslim girls are not permitted to marry a Christian & if they do so they’ve got to have a reason or greater cause may be achieve a better outcome. It’s all curtain dressing. Look @ Dianna Haddad what was she doing between 16 to 19 before she got married to Sohail. Any parent would’ve monitored their children’s progress, especially a daughter if a man is directly in her life. She then marries him & suddenly converts to Shia Islam. Simply cause she got married in Islamic traditions she had to make it look all good by being Shia so it was a choice. Her mother was allowing her to get sexually involved with this man for convenient purposes. This is why she felt sorrowful & regret after her farther passed away cause she knew what her & her mother were conjuring up. Dianna farther was lied to by the mother & the marriage took place. To make it look all legitimate she converted to Shia Islam but that’s simply because she had a Muslim wedding. She is a slut in my eyes & allows that to happen not factoring the hell Christians received under Islamic Jihadist movements. I want us to have reconciliation but that cannot happen if you have that mentality taking place, whereby they’ll always look @ us as inferior.
Christian Wants to Baptize Son in Church
ar – en – ur – es
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I am married to a Christian woman and I live now in Lebanon and she lives in her country and we now have a baby and his age is about 2 months. Now she is telling me that she wants to make the baby Christian and she wants to take him to church to make this happen. What do I do? I need a solution and what should I say to her.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
It is permissible for a Muslim man to marry a Christian woman, if she is chaste. Because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Made lawful to you this day are At‑Tayyibaat [all kinds of Halaal (lawful) foods, which Allaah has made lawful (meat of slaughtered eatable animals, milk products, fats, vegetables and fruits)]. The food (slaughtered cattle, eatable animals) of the people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians) is lawful to you and yours is lawful to them. (Lawful to you in marriage) are chaste women from the believers and chaste women from those who were given the Scripture (Jews and Christians) before your time when you have given their due Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage), desiring chastity (i.e. taking them in legal wedlock) not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girlfriends”
[al-Maa’idah 5:5]
However it is not advisable to marry a kitaabi (i.e., Jewish or Christian) woman nowadays, because it is fraught with dangers, especially with regard to the children’s upbringing.
Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If the kitaabi woman is known to be chaste and to keep away from the things that lead to immoral actions, then it is permissible, because Allaah has permitted us to marry their women and eat their food.
But nowadays there is the fear of great evil for those who marry them, because they may call him to their religion and that may lead to his children becoming Christian, so the danger is great. In order to be on the safe side, the believer should not marry her. Moreover, there is no guarantee that she will not fall into immoral ways, and attribute to him children who are not his. But if he needs to do that then there is nothing wrong with it, so that he can keep himself chaste and lower his gaze, and he should strive to call her to Islam, and beware of her evil lest she drag him or the children into kufr (disbelief). End quote from Fataawa Islamiyyah (3/172).
Hence you can see that the Christianization of the children is one of the greatest dangers to be feared as a result of marrying a Christian woman. Undoubtedly it is not permissible for you to allow that under any circumstances. You should have made it clear to her before marriage that your children would be Muslims and that they could not be made Christians, and that this issue was not open to discussion or compromise.
What you have to do now is protect your son’s religion and prevent him from being made a Christian. If your wife insists on that then you have no choice but to make her stay with you in your city, or keep the child only, even if that leads to you leaving her and divorcing her. This is a serious matter, because it is the matter of kufr and faith; we seek refuge with Allaah from misguidance.
It should be noted that the child’s being baptized does not actually make him a Christian, rather he is a Muslim who follows the religion of his Muslim father, and he cannot become a Christian unless he understands Christianity and chooses it for himself. As for his baptism, he has no choice in the matter, and it does not affect the religion which Allaah created in him, which is Islam.
Try by all means to protect this child and prevent him being taught Christian teachings. Remember that you are responsible for him and that the worst neglect and betrayal of this trust would be to leave him disbelieving in Allaah.
We ask Allaah to protect you and your offspring and to divert evil away from them.
And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A
It’s nine o’clock on a summer evening in the old city of Damascus. Michel and Leila are sitting in the courtyard of a house they share with other young Syrians. I ask them how they met.
Topic M magazine
“We were at a party by the seaside,” remembers Leila.
“I asked her for a dance,” explains Michel, “and I haven’t been able to get her off my back ever since,” he adds. That was four years ago. Michel and Leila now want to get married. The problem is, they can’t. Michel is Christian, Leila is Muslim, and in Syria it is illegal for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim.
Although Syria is considered to be one of only a few secular Arab countries, the principal source of legislation for personal affairs is Sharia law, which defines marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man as invalid. This applies in all Muslim countries that adopt Sharia law.
“This is a red line and it’s not acceptable to cross it. It has huge implications,” says Michel, a 28-year-old translator.
There is no civil marriage in Syria and the only legal way they could marry would be for Michel to convert to Islam. But he doesn’t want to, first, because he is not religious and second, because converting would have irreversible social consequences. “I would be rejected by my family and my community. Basically by 90 per cent of the people I know,” he says.
Leila, a 25-year-old nurse who is a Sunni-Muslim – the main branch of Islam that makes up 74 per cent of the Syrian population – says her close family is very open-minded. “My parents have absolutely no problem,” she says, but the rest of her family is conservative.
As Michel puts it, the worst case scenario for him would be being cast out by his family. But for Leila the consequences could be much more serious. “If one of her relatives decides to kill her to defend the honour of her family, what can I do?” he asks.
Leila and Michel have decided to travel abroad and are now applying for a visa to live in Canada. Michel says he would rather stay in Syria if the law were different. “Most people dream about going abroad. But I have a very decent job here, I like what I do, the same goes for Leila. We’d have a great future here. But we have to make a choice.”
As Michel steps away to take a phone call, Leila confesses that the law is not the only issue here. “He doesn’t like to speak about it, but his family totally rejects me, whether we travel or not.”
A survey published in 2008 by the Syrian newspaper Al Nour found that, from more than 500 university students interviewed, 64 per cent were in favour of the legalisation of civil marriage. However, 40 per cent said they would prefer to sever relations with anyone who married outside their faith.
Indeed, leaving aside the issue of the law and even if the different religious groups mainly live in harmony, getting married outside the community is still predominantly not accepted in Syrian society.
Bassam, who is 31 and a Catholic bachelor and an Arabic teacher, tells me that if his sister had married a Muslim man, he would have killed her. “Seriously?” I ask. He hesitates. “No, I wouldn’t have killed her. But I would have never spoken to her again.”
“It’s not about religion,” says Bassam, who goes to church only on the main Christian holidays. “It’s about culture. We are a minority in Syria. If Christians start marrying Muslims, we are going to disappear.” In Syria, Christians make up just ten per cent of the population.
I can’t believe that Muslim’s still live as if they are in times of Muhammad. Ummm, it’s the 21st century. We don’t buy wives, men are expected to be as pure, or unpure as women. It doesn’t hurt for children of mixed religion to learn both religions and decide for themselves. Time for Arab children to cut the apron strings to their parents and quit worring about what the rest of the family will think of them. Love is suppose to be unconditional, same as God/Allah’s love for us. Talk about mind control, you can still be dedicated to your family and God/Allah and marry someone of another religion. If your religion says you can’t then I’d rethink what you have chosen to believe in.
I’ll be all for interfaith marriage if Christians & other minority Islamic sects are given right to exist as equals community. When they’re not seen as second class citizens. The women who engage in these marriages should test there partners see if they harness these views either directly or there extended families. Meaning of love is to respect & treat your partner as equal. My argument is they harness these views opinions then waste of time.
I am a Catholic- Maronite woman and have recently been dating a Muslim Shi3i man. When I first met him I didn’t ask him about his religion because for some odd reason I just sort of assumed he was Christian. I later learned that he was Muslim and I was a bit shocked hearing the news. I come from a very religious and political family in Lebanon and I know that they would not agree with me choosing him. I am so in love with him, he is like my twin. We share soo many similarities yet are so different. It’s still early in the relationship and I know were not going to tie the knot anytime soon but it begs the question. I don’t want this to hinder us from being together one day and being fully happy. He tells me he loves me and wants to take it to the next level and by all means I feel the same. He tells me he is not religious but that could change as we age. I guess what Im trying to say is, everything can be worked out. I love this man and I am willing to undergo any obstacles that come our way!
Sonya this is a scare tactic. Look @ his extended family look @ there history you’ll be devestated to see reality. You need to realise he cannot unlock this reality. If he did & accepts your children to choose there respective religions then go for it. But you’ll be hurt and devestated. He will tell you what you want to hear. He will follow his sectarian lines. Furthermore your Gemayel his family will do anything to try and win you over as a symbol of political victory. You are wasting your time, take your situation and live in Iraq and you’ll have no rights. The only reason why Interfaith marriages exist is because Maronite Catholics are strong in power. If Islam was strong then you’ll loose all rights. Stop thinking love conquers all. If the conditions were different then you will know the reality. Look @ how Christians are treated in Middle East in general. If he was to love you, then he will stand for equal political, legal and citizen rights. Lets see if he will do so, the answer will hurt you because he will not. His family and extended family will put pressure on him and you will suffer. You choose that life and see what will happen. Look @ Christians of Eqypt and how they are. I’m for a Christian woman to marry other interfaiths except for islam because they breed hatred to our beliefs. They hate the farther the son and holy spirit His love for you is a a way to take you away and conform to his life. If I’m wrong you’ll be in good hands. Inshallah. But in saying this what does his family think of Bashir Gemayel did you forget the suffering and the war. I want peace with muslims in Lebanon, but they will never except us as equals as Koran states that clearly. So look at why your family are they way they are and thats because its to survive amongst muslims.
dear bashir! not all of them are like that!! my family are muslim shi3a from lebanon. my cousin´s mother married a christian man 30 years ago and my sister will marry her christian boyfriend next year. we dont hate christians at all! during the civil war both sides made mistakes and killed each other. maybe the lebanese muslims made a mistake when they were on the palestinians side instead with their christian brothers and sisters. – we should start a new chapter! lebanon for christians and muslims!! ps: i love bachir gemayel and i know for what he fought, for your existence!
If he starts talking to you about Hezoballah and Hassan Nssrallah then get out of it. If his family has any link to this party then your doomed. Reason being because they’re ultimate end is to have Islamic Power as President. So how do you know this will ultimately affect you, because you will be seen as a no one. Your views will not count because they want you to conform and accept that life style. Why because they dont accept Christians as equals. So how do you think you’ll be an equal.
It should be quite clear from my referred answer that marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man has not been directly prohibited by the Qur’an. However, it has not been explicitly allowed either, as is the case regarding marriage between a Muslim man and a woman from among the Jews or the Christians. Those who hold marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man to be prohibited do not do so because “religion passes through the man in Islam”. They may give a number of reasons for this prohibition, but the fact of the matter is that none of these reasons is based on the Qur’an or the teachings of the Prophet (pbuh). All these reasons are basically there own understanding and explanation of the issue. Furthermore, the prohibition – even in their eyes – is because of their interpretation of the related verses, not because of the reason that they ascribe to such prohibition.
In my opinion, therefore, the real question is not “why” is the marriage between a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man prohibited, but it should actually be: “does the Shari`ah really prohibit such a marriage”.
From UI web site
Q. What is Islam’s standings on:
Non-Muslim man marrying a Muslim woman
Muslim man marrying non-Muslim woman
“Non-Muslim” refers to Christians, Hindus etc.
Answer:
A few aspects of your question are directly covered by the Qur’an , while in case of the others the matter would be decided by Ijtehaad. For instance, the Qur’an has clearly stated that:
Women from the people of the book, that is Jewish and Christian women are lawful (in marriage) for Muslim men (Al-Maaidah 5: 5); and
Polytheist (Mushrik) men and women are unlawful (in marriage) for Muslim men and women (Al-Baqarah 2: 221).
Although the verses from which these directives are derived may be interpreted slightly differently. For instance, in the case of women from amongst the people of the book, one could be of the opinion that
the stated permission has been granted without any qualifications, that is, all Jewish and Christian women, under all circumstances are lawful to be taken in marriage by Muslim men; and
the stated permission was granted only when Islam became the dominant force in the region (the conditions prevalent at the time of the revelation of Al-Maaidah) and, therefore, the marriage with Jewish and Christian women is permitted only when the social and cultural values of Islam become the dominant values of the society in which the man and the woman, who intend to marry are living.
In the same way, one may interpret Al-Baqarah 2: 221 as:
prohibiting all men and women with polytheistic beliefs, as the words might apparently suggest. This interpretation will mean that all groups present in the world that hold any form of polytheistic belief or indulge in any kind of polytheistic practice shall stand prohibited for Muslim men and women. According to this interpretation all the sects of Hindus, Christians, Jews and Muslims that, in the eyes of another sect, hold a polytheistic belief or indulge in a polytheistic practice shall stand prohibited for that sect;
prohibiting only those men and women for marriage who, like the Quraish of Mekkah and the Banu Ishmael, hold polytheism to be the true religious belief. This interpretation implies that a person may hold a certain polytheistic belief without ascribing to polytheism and without holding polytheism to be correct, as is the case with some of the Jews, some of the Christians and also some Muslims. No one among these three groups holds polytheism to be the correct religious belief but may due to some philosophical error or a misunderstanding indulge in polytheistic practices. This interpretation would mean that all those groups that ascribe to polytheism and hold polytheism as the correct belief and openly accept polytheism as their religious belief are prohibited for Muslims. Other groups that do not ascribe to polytheism although, due to any reason, hold and indulge in polytheistic beliefs and practices are not covered in this verse. According to this interpretation all those religions (or any sects of that religion) that hold polytheism to be the true belief shall stand prohibited for Muslim men and women. Many sects of Hindus that hold polytheism as their belief shall fall in this category; and
prohibiting only the men and women of the Banu Ishmael. That is, this verse does not prohibit all polytheists but actually prohibits marital and social relations with the Banu Ishmael only because of their particular position of rejecting the messenger of God who was sent to them. It should be remembered that according to the Qur’an the rejection of Banu Ishmael was not like that of any other group of the world. The Banu Ishmael rejected faith after itmam e hujjah[1] and because of that had to face the consequences of their rejection in the life of this world as well as in the hereafter. It should also be remembered that the word “Mushrik” has been used in the Qur’an basically for this group. This view shall imply that all the non-Muslim groups of the world – also including Hindus – shall now be given the same position as is given in the Qur’an to the people of the book – the Jews and the Christians.
The case of a Muslim woman marrying a non-Muslim man – except that of prohibiting polytheist men for them – has not been directly covered in the Qur’an . One may hold the opinion that by permitting marriage between Muslim men and Jewish and Christian women, the Qur’an has also permitted marriage between Muslim women and Jewish and Christian men. While on the other hand, one may hold the opinion that by specifically mentioning the permission of marriage between Muslim men and Jewish and Christian women, the Qur’an has implied its dislike for marriage between Christian or Jewish men with a Muslim woman.
As the above explanation would clearly show the issue could have various answers. A person should consider the reasoning of the parties holding these different opinions and follow the particular opinion that in his understanding is the strongest and closest to the directives of the Qur’an .
“In Islam we don’t have a problem in allowing our men to marry Christian women. But we cannot accept our women marrying Christian men because they do not believe in Islam,” Oraymet said, adding that men are considered to be more powerful than women, so they have the ability to convince their wives to convert.
So what kind of religion is Islam breeding religious segregation & discrimination. So why should I support a Civil Marriage between a Muslim man & Christian woman. Because when it comes to it, you can say you married in civil marriage but it holds no water when you live in Lebanon, reason being he will raise the children in Islam & you won’t have a say. Unless his proven otherwise then good. But the above statement makes it clear enough of Islamic agenda. So I’m right.
I am a Muslim (which means submitting of will to God only).You have a lot of misconceptions about Islam. It is not a new religion, but it is a religion which God himself enjoined upon all prophets like Adam,Eve,Noah,Abraham,Issac,Ismael,Moses,Jesus,Muhammad,etc. Peace be upon them all.. The foundation of Christianity is based on “Trinity” but the word “Trinity” is nowhere in the Bible.infact Bible says “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: (Deut. C.6 V.4.)”
Also Jesus pbuh said “I can do of my nothing but the will of my father”.Same is there in the Quran..
You christians believe in the Bible,you have 4 gospels. But where is the Gospel which was given to Jesus?
—Nadeem_Ul_Haq on 1/11/12
Well you’re not supposed to.Islam is a very strict religion and false religion.Unless youre a very dominant person. I’m married to a muslim man for 14 years and were very happy. But our children are Christian and they know that islam is a false religion. Islam is a replica of the Old and New Testament. But he always celebrate Christmas every year eith us which he loves! He doesnt get along with his family only with mine which helps alot.But if someone is going to get married with a muslim you just have to be very strong on your faith and like I said be very dominant! Don’t be like those women that are weak and very naive.
—Dawn on 4/9/11
ank>>>Try and get out if you can!
—catherine on 10/24/10
HI!i am married with a muslim man for 11years,and is a hellllll ….wich i can t describe you in words.
Be very carefull what you decide about mariage,because after little time past he is gona show you the rules of muslim man.
I don’t say they are all the same but in general you don’t have opinion or word to say in any way.
If you can handle this ….go on ….bat if you dream that you have the same life after …..i don’t think so.
—ank on 10/23/10
Francis– You have a point. There are numerous modern American woman who have married Muslim men in the United States, thinking that since they were not very religious and their Muslim mate seemed tolerant, they could find happiness.
After the couple has a child, he decides they should “visit” his family in
…Egypt, Jordan, Iran etc. They do. But the “visit” never ends. The husband reverts to his cultural roots. The wife becomes an oppressed, disrespected family member. She’s prevented from communicating with family in the US. The child is raised a Muslim by his family.
A woman’s compliant nature can cause her great trouble.
—Donna66 on 6/7/10
My point was, it is different when christian men marry none christian women. They woman do conform or at least they should conform since the man is the head of the home. Ot the priest in the home.
And i gave several text for that men including Joseph, Moses and any soldier who wanted a none jewish wife.
—francis on 6/7/10
I do not know the religion of Asenath or the Ethiopian woman. Were they even religious? Did they worship idols? Would they be just as happy worshiping the God of the Hebrews?
Islam did not exist in the days of either Moses of Joseph. But today it is a strongly anti-Christian religion.
Shane –Islam has no requirement to be truthful with an “infidel” (Christians and Jews). If you are really a Christian, not one in name only, the marriage would surly be a disaster…for you personally as well as for your faith!
—Donna66 on 6/7/10
Genesis 41:45 And Pharaoh called Joseph’s name Zaphnathpaaneah, and he gave him to wife Asenath the daughter of Potipherah priest of On.
Numbers 12:1 And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman.
Deuteronomy 21:10 When thou goest forth to war against thine enemies..,
Deuteronomy 21:11 And seest among the captives a beautiful woman, and hast a desire unto her, that thou wouldest have her to thy wife, ..,
Deuteronomy 21:13 .. and she shall be thy wife.
Somehow or the other MEN are able to marry none believsrs. Is it because men are leaders of thier homes and dictate the religious practoice of the household?
—francis on 6/7/10
No. Marriages between people of different religions are bad. A prime purpose for religions is to act to defined differences between people and peoples where they don’t really exist. Marriages between people of different religions may succeed because of the love of the two people involved and as a result the devisiveness and conflict caused by religions that should be generated and passed on to the next generation could be lost. Religious intermarriage could result in less hatred in the world, and weaken the the religions of adherents engaged in in such marriages.
—atheist on 6/5/10
NO you may not, unless your christianity is just something because you are born in England and you have English parents. (in other words then your not even a Christian).
—Andy3996 on 6/1/10
can i marry a muslim girl, i am english christian , she in malaysain?
—chris_bullock on 5/31/10
I agree with what warwick said. I really wonder if the people on this site are actually christians at all. I was very happy when I found this site, but as I go through it I am afraid this is not where I need to be. No, I don’t think a relationship between a Muslim and a christian is a good idea. If the person is a devout muslim, they will not marry you any way(with you being a christian).The Christian can not be a real true Christian or they would know not to marry outside the faith. Now, back to this site. I came here looking for christian friends,but when I got on the profiles and seen the pictures.It looked like some kind of trashy worldly dating site. Women not dressed modest. I believe there is a picture with someone with a drink in hand.
—angea4937 on 12/29/09
i believe GOD is big!
i also believe that what one person views, and what is right for them doesn’t necessarily work for everyone.
Tamar, i believe that in your heart if you feel that its right and your not compromising your faith in anyway i believe that its between you and god to decide whether its right.
im currently with a muslim man, and when it comes to issues about god, neither of us comprise what we have with our relationship with god, if this was the case then i wouldn’t think its right and i wouldn’t be in the relationship.
when it comes to talking about our faith (religion) we always listen and respect the other, we openly discuss it.
but listen to god and seek gods wisdom and direction
—danni on 12/27/09
“i am dating a musilm guy who have asked me to marry him,i am a christian, we both know about each others religion. i have deep feelings for him but something in me is not permittin me to accept his proposal. we both speak the same language but still we have difficulties in getting our point across. can someone explain this to me”
—shery
Yes, Shery, I can explain it. The terms and phrases you use to explain your faith sounds the same but the meaning is different.
You accept Jesus and so do the Muslims. They just don’t accept Him as God or Savior.
You have experienced the tip of the iceberg. Marry this guy and you will receive the full wrath of his religion. Christians practice Christianity not religion.
—Elder on 10/19/09
“Can a christian marry a muslim?”
blog question
Let me ask you this, can a christian stay married to a muslim?
—Nana on 10/17/09
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Warwick you and Alan are correct in defining the terms. This is not the Bobby I heard mention how we are to define the terms. This Bobby needs to find the definition of the word love, because he says he loves that muslim girl. So the question to him is, Whom does he love more, his muslim girlfriend or God? He will choose who’s love is more important. And Shery should also needs to indentify the terms of her commitment to Christ. She already feels she should not take the proposal, and that thought comes from her conscience, where the Holy Spirit works. To a believer, never go against conscience.
—MarkV. on 10/16/09
Thanks Alan. We definitely need to define our terms, otherwise things are somewhat meaningless.
—Warwick on 10/14/09
Warwick … I remember tthat once I asked a man if he was a Christian, and his reply was …
“Of course I am a Christian … I am white and English”
It bears out your point
—alan8566_of_uk on 10/14/09
I believe the word ‘Christian’ is meaningless to some here. I wonder if those who say they are Christian only mean they have a christian culture but do not Follow Christ.
No Bible-believing Jesus-following person could marry a Muslim. Scripture says ‘Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?’ And surely Scripture, not our falible feelings, nor how nice the Muslim is, should decide what is right in God’s eyes.
Any Musim cannot be by definition a Christian believer, therefore Christian/Muslim marriage is an example of being unequally yoked.
—Warwick on 10/14/09
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i am dating a musilm guy who have asked me to marry him,i am a christian, we both know about each others religion. i have deep feelings for him but something in me is not permittin me to accept his proposal. we both speak the same language but still we have difficulties in getting our point across. every time we come together it is a clash. can someone explain this to me
—shery on 10/13/09
Look i have respect for all religions and do not want to disgrace nor take lightly the fact that this is people’s beliefs. In saying this i have a serious problem, i believe i am in love with a muslim woman. I would be considered a christian but do not practice. I live in her muslim contry. We both like each other very much, and i would just like to hear some views and advice on what to do. I would be willing to do anything it takes to be with her including converting. What steps should i take to be with this woman, and how would i make her family accept me? She is not a devout muslim but her family is. I believe in love and think it’s possible to overcome any obstacle if two people are truly in love. Any thoughts are welcome, thank you
—bobby on 8/6/09
Tamar, you are on dangerous ground and using human justification for your passions. Trust God to lead you into what is after all a biblical institution.
What would your ministry look like as husband and wife if you are married to a Muslim.
I am sympathetic for loneliness or whatever else must be fueling your passion, but such choices have real consequences. Slow down.
I trust God, so ask your fiance to join you in prayer and seek the face of Jesus in this decision. Pray together nightly because prayer is ultimately agreeing with God and the fakers will eventually bug out.
To love God is to obey him.
If your fiance balks, run away as fast as you can.
—larry on 7/20/09
Anyone who does not believe that Jesus is God is not a Christian and should please stop deceiving herself
in Christianity, you do not make your own decisions because Jesus becomes not only your Saviour but LORD as well.
Not all that say Lord, Lord will enter into the Kingdom of heaven but those who obey the Father
Obeying includes not marrying a non-christian
light and darkness cannot get married that is what Jesus’ command is
you are either a christian or you are not
—PAT on 7/20/09
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I am a divorced christian woman. my x-husband was christian too and i lived in hell with him. I have one son from him, he even dont care about his son. Now im in love with muslem men, he is so good. He loves my son as if he is his son. He does everything to make me feel happy and stands beside me in any situation. He loves me as i am and respects me alot. So i think religion is not what makes a person but his kindness and personality. Im with my muslem lover the most happy woman on earth and im ready to marry him and stay with him all my life because he is a great person…
—Tamar on 7/11/09
All arguments aside: we know what the bible says on the matter (be not unequally yoked), HOWEVER, if you already married then you stay with this person. Can a christian and a muslim marry? Of course! SHOULD they? Not really. BUT remember, God is a BIG God and He can turn things around!
Whatever your situation, pray unceasingly! God will answer you with HIS will! You must be open to it! If you ask Him for the strength you need to remove yourself, then HE will give it!
God has a plan and a purpose – it is only up to us to DISCOVER it. He’s really in control, so just believe, pray, and wait. Brothers/Sisters, that’s all we can do. What a GOOD God we serve today!
—elmapatterson on 4/14/09
I was married to a Muslim man from Cairo Eqypt. We had a warm, loving, caring marriage and would still be together if it had not been for 9/11. I loved him too much to see the way he was being treated after 9/11/ To this day, we still send emails back and forth daily.
—Lois on 3/1/09
hello,
My name is Donna…I am married to a Moroccan man, hes muslim and I am christian, I was in a severely abusive 1st marriage, my first husband made my life hell, so when Abde and I met and I saw the fine qualities in him, I was drawn to his kind and gentle ways, contrary to the stories you hear about the treatment of women in Islam..it is not true, muslim men put a high value on their wives, they do not believe in infidelity, if they are a true muslim they are wonderful husbands, I can tell you my experience with my muslim husband has been great…We talk about our differences in beliefs all the time and we dont argue about it, I know in my heart someday Jesus will reveal himself to my husband..I love him so much
—Donna on 2/24/09
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if you are traditional christian through birth, and he is a muslim by name alone, no problem both your faiths are only luggage any way. yet if you love christ and his church, you an never marry someone who is member of a group that dedicates itself to destroy the memory of Jesus christ Emanuel.I read the coran and no good Muslim can ever let christians live acording their book. any muslim who compromises with christians in any way is worse then a pig and deserves to be killed. sorry it sound viollent but these are facts.
—Andy on 2/5/09
I believe that God loves Muslims and Christians alike. Remember that Abraham had two sons. God chose to bless them both. The Apostle Paul said: A man could be saved by his wife who is a believer in Christ. If God gives me a Muslim husband to love, I will love him and be his wife. The word of God says,”I will also bless the foreigners who commit themselves to the Lord. Who serve Him and love His name, who worship Him…and who hold fast to My covenant. I will bring them to My holy mountain of Jerusalem and will fill them with joy in my house of prayer…for the Sovereign Lord who brings back the outcasts…says: I will bring others, too, besides My people Israel(Isaiah 57:6-8).” Christ is my Lord and Savior and I love Muslim people:)
—Jewel_Opalenik on 1/11/09
Tish, the command is, “Do not be unequally yoked together with nonbelievers.” Because a nonbeliever’s heart is exceedingly kind is not enough, it is not enough to keep the second commandment of loving your neighbor as yourself, but also the soul must keep the first commandment and accept Christ and worship him as their Lord God in Spirit and in truth. For hell runs over with “nice” people who are idolaters and reject Christ.
—Eloy on 1/8/09
I’m talking to a guy who is a Muslim and his heart is so great. See, I dated a Christian for 3 years and the way he treated me compared to this new guy, was horrific! Not to say I ran into a muslim guys arm but he was there for me when I needed. He encourages me and accepts me as I am. Though I will never commit apostasy against Jesus Christ and I feel called to become a minister, It really sucks that Christians will never give me a chance because he is muslim but having met and been accepted by his mother, it goes to show how backwards Christians can be some time. We preach about accepting and then shun. I’m not sure about marriage as yet, God’s will be done.
nadeem, if you are muslim, what are you doing on a christian web site? Just wondering. My God and alla are nothing alike.
—shira4368 on 1/11/12
I am a Muslim (which means submitting of will to God only).You have a lot of misconceptions about Islam. It is not a new religion, but it is a religion which God himself enjoined upon all prophets like Adam,Eve,Noah,Abraham,Issac,Ismael,Moses,Jesus,Muhammad,etc. Peace be upon them all.. The foundation of Christianity is based on “Trinity” but the word “Trinity” is nowhere in the Bible.infact Bible says “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: (Deut. C.6 V.4.)”
Also Jesus pbuh said “I can do of my nothing but the will of my father”.Same is there in the Quran..
You christians believe in the Bible,you have 4 gospels. But where is the Gospel which was given to Jesus?
—Nadeem_Ul_Haq on 1/11/12
Well you’re not supposed to.Islam is a very strict religion and false religion.Unless youre a very dominant person. I’m married to a muslim man for 14 years and were very happy. But our children are Christian and they know that islam is a false religion. Islam is a replica of the Old and New Testament. But he always celebrate Christmas every year eith us which he loves! He doesnt get along with his family only with mine which helps alot.But if someone is going to get married with a muslim you just have to be very strong on your faith and like I said be very dominant! Don’t be like those women that are weak and very naive.
—Dawn on 4/9/11
ank>>>Try and get out if you can!
—catherine on 10/24/10
HI!i am married with a muslim man for 11years,and is a hellllll ….wich i can t describe you in words.
Be very carefull what you decide about mariage,because after little time past he is gona show you the rules of muslim man.
I don’t say they are all the same but in general you don’t have opinion or word to say in any way.
If you can handle this ….go on ….bat if you dream that you have the same life after …..i don’t think so.
—ank on 10/23/10
Francis– You have a point. There are numerous modern American woman who have married Muslim men in the United States, thinking that since they were not very religious and their Muslim mate seemed tolerant, they could find happiness.
After the couple has a child, he decides they should “visit” his family in
…Egypt, Jordan, Iran etc. They do. But the “visit” never ends. The husband reverts to his cultural roots. The wife becomes an oppressed, disrespected family member. She’s prevented from communicating with family in the US. The child is raised a Muslim by his family.
A woman’s compliant nature can cause her great trouble.
—Donna66 on 6/7/10
My point was, it is different when christian men marry none christian women. They woman do conform or at least they should conform since the man is the head of the home. Ot the priest in the home.
And i gave several text for that men including Joseph, Moses and any soldier who wanted a none jewish wife.
—francis on 6/7/10
I do not know the religion of Asenath or the Ethiopian woman. Were they even religious? Did they worship idols? Would they be just as happy worshiping the God of the Hebrews?
Islam did not exist in the days of either Moses of Joseph. But today it is a strongly anti-Christian religion.
Shane –Islam has no requirement to be truthful with an “infidel” (Christians and Jews). If you are really a Christian, not one in name only, the marriage would surly be a disaster…for you personally as well as for your faith!
—Donna66 on 6/7/10
Genesis 41:45 And Pharaoh called Joseph’s name Zaphnathpaaneah, and he gave him to wife Asenath the daughter of Potipherah priest of On.
Numbers 12:1 And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman.
Deuteronomy 21:10 When thou goest forth to war against thine enemies..,
Deuteronomy 21:11 And seest among the captives a beautiful woman, and hast a desire unto her, that thou wouldest have her to thy wife, ..,
Deuteronomy 21:13 .. and she shall be thy wife.
Somehow or the other MEN are able to marry none believsrs. Is it because men are leaders of thier homes and dictate the religious practoice of the household?
—francis on 6/7/10
No. Marriages between people of different religions are bad. A prime purpose for religions is to act to defined differences between people and peoples where they don’t really exist. Marriages between people of different religions may succeed because of the love of the two people involved and as a result the devisiveness and conflict caused by religions that should be generated and passed on to the next generation could be lost. Religious intermarriage could result in less hatred in the world, and weaken the the religions of adherents engaged in in such marriages.
—atheist on 6/5/10
NO you may not, unless your christianity is just something because you are born in England and you have English parents. (in other words then your not even a Christian).
—Andy3996 on 6/1/10
can i marry a muslim girl, i am english christian , she in malaysain?
—chris_bullock on 5/31/10
I agree with what warwick said. I really wonder if the people on this site are actually christians at all. I was very happy when I found this site, but as I go through it I am afraid this is not where I need to be. No, I don’t think a relationship between a Muslim and a christian is a good idea. If the person is a devout muslim, they will not marry you any way(with you being a christian).The Christian can not be a real true Christian or they would know not to marry outside the faith. Now, back to this site. I came here looking for christian friends,but when I got on the profiles and seen the pictures.It looked like some kind of trashy worldly dating site. Women not dressed modest. I believe there is a picture with someone with a drink in hand.
—angea4937 on 12/29/09
i believe GOD is big!
i also believe that what one person views, and what is right for them doesn’t necessarily work for everyone.
Tamar, i believe that in your heart if you feel that its right and your not compromising your faith in anyway i believe that its between you and god to decide whether its right.
im currently with a muslim man, and when it comes to issues about god, neither of us comprise what we have with our relationship with god, if this was the case then i wouldn’t think its right and i wouldn’t be in the relationship.
when it comes to talking about our faith (religion) we always listen and respect the other, we openly discuss it.
but listen to god and seek gods wisdom and direction
—danni on 12/27/09
“i am dating a musilm guy who have asked me to marry him,i am a christian, we both know about each others religion. i have deep feelings for him but something in me is not permittin me to accept his proposal. we both speak the same language but still we have difficulties in getting our point across. can someone explain this to me”
—shery
Yes, Shery, I can explain it. The terms and phrases you use to explain your faith sounds the same but the meaning is different.
You accept Jesus and so do the Muslims. They just don’t accept Him as God or Savior.
You have experienced the tip of the iceberg. Marry this guy and you will receive the full wrath of his religion. Christians practice Christianity not religion.
—Elder on 10/19/09
“Can a christian marry a muslim?”
blog question
Let me ask you this, can a christian stay married to a muslim?
—Nana on 10/17/09
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Warwick you and Alan are correct in defining the terms. This is not the Bobby I heard mention how we are to define the terms. This Bobby needs to find the definition of the word love, because he says he loves that muslim girl. So the question to him is, Whom does he love more, his muslim girlfriend or God? He will choose who’s love is more important. And Shery should also needs to indentify the terms of her commitment to Christ. She already feels she should not take the proposal, and that thought comes from her conscience, where the Holy Spirit works. To a believer, never go against conscience.
—MarkV. on 10/16/09
Thanks Alan. We definitely need to define our terms, otherwise things are somewhat meaningless.
—Warwick on 10/14/09
Warwick … I remember tthat once I asked a man if he was a Christian, and his reply was …
“Of course I am a Christian … I am white and English”
It bears out your point
—alan8566_of_uk on 10/14/09
I believe the word ‘Christian’ is meaningless to some here. I wonder if those who say they are Christian only mean they have a christian culture but do not Follow Christ.
No Bible-believing Jesus-following person could marry a Muslim. Scripture says ‘Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?’ And surely Scripture, not our falible feelings, nor how nice the Muslim is, should decide what is right in God’s eyes.
Any Musim cannot be by definition a Christian believer, therefore Christian/Muslim marriage is an example of being unequally yoked.
—Warwick on 10/14/09
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i am dating a musilm guy who have asked me to marry him,i am a christian, we both know about each others religion. i have deep feelings for him but something in me is not permittin me to accept his proposal. we both speak the same language but still we have difficulties in getting our point across. every time we come together it is a clash. can someone explain this to me
—shery on 10/13/09
Look i have respect for all religions and do not want to disgrace nor take lightly the fact that this is people’s beliefs. In saying this i have a serious problem, i believe i am in love with a muslim woman. I would be considered a christian but do not practice. I live in her muslim contry. We both like each other very much, and i would just like to hear some views and advice on what to do. I would be willing to do anything it takes to be with her including converting. What steps should i take to be with this woman, and how would i make her family accept me? She is not a devout muslim but her family is. I believe in love and think it’s possible to overcome any obstacle if two people are truly in love. Any thoughts are welcome, thank you
—bobby on 8/6/09
Tamar, you are on dangerous ground and using human justification for your passions. Trust God to lead you into what is after all a biblical institution.
What would your ministry look like as husband and wife if you are married to a Muslim.
I am sympathetic for loneliness or whatever else must be fueling your passion, but such choices have real consequences. Slow down.
I trust God, so ask your fiance to join you in prayer and seek the face of Jesus in this decision. Pray together nightly because prayer is ultimately agreeing with God and the fakers will eventually bug out.
To love God is to obey him.
If your fiance balks, run away as fast as you can.
—larry on 7/20/09
Anyone who does not believe that Jesus is God is not a Christian and should please stop deceiving herself
in Christianity, you do not make your own decisions because Jesus becomes not only your Saviour but LORD as well.
Not all that say Lord, Lord will enter into the Kingdom of heaven but those who obey the Father
Obeying includes not marrying a non-christian
light and darkness cannot get married that is what Jesus’ command is
you are either a christian or you are not
—PAT on 7/20/09
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I am a divorced christian woman. my x-husband was christian too and i lived in hell with him. I have one son from him, he even dont care about his son. Now im in love with muslem men, he is so good. He loves my son as if he is his son. He does everything to make me feel happy and stands beside me in any situation. He loves me as i am and respects me alot. So i think religion is not what makes a person but his kindness and personality. Im with my muslem lover the most happy woman on earth and im ready to marry him and stay with him all my life because he is a great person…
—Tamar on 7/11/09
All arguments aside: we know what the bible says on the matter (be not unequally yoked), HOWEVER, if you already married then you stay with this person. Can a christian and a muslim marry? Of course! SHOULD they? Not really. BUT remember, God is a BIG God and He can turn things around!
Whatever your situation, pray unceasingly! God will answer you with HIS will! You must be open to it! If you ask Him for the strength you need to remove yourself, then HE will give it!
God has a plan and a purpose – it is only up to us to DISCOVER it. He’s really in control, so just believe, pray, and wait. Brothers/Sisters, that’s all we can do. What a GOOD God we serve today!
—elmapatterson on 4/14/09
I was married to a Muslim man from Cairo Eqypt. We had a warm, loving, caring marriage and would still be together if it had not been for 9/11. I loved him too much to see the way he was being treated after 9/11/ To this day, we still send emails back and forth daily.
—Lois on 3/1/09
hello,
My name is Donna…I am married to a Moroccan man, hes muslim and I am christian, I was in a severely abusive 1st marriage, my first husband made my life hell, so when Abde and I met and I saw the fine qualities in him, I was drawn to his kind and gentle ways, contrary to the stories you hear about the treatment of women in Islam..it is not true, muslim men put a high value on their wives, they do not believe in infidelity, if they are a true muslim they are wonderful husbands, I can tell you my experience with my muslim husband has been great…We talk about our differences in beliefs all the time and we dont argue about it, I know in my heart someday Jesus will reveal himself to my husband..I love him so much
—Donna on 2/24/09
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if you are traditional christian through birth, and he is a muslim by name alone, no problem both your faiths are only luggage any way. yet if you love christ and his church, you an never marry someone who is member of a group that dedicates itself to destroy the memory of Jesus christ Emanuel.I read the coran and no good Muslim can ever let christians live acording their book. any muslim who compromises with christians in any way is worse then a pig and deserves to be killed. sorry it sound viollent but these are facts.
—Andy on 2/5/09
I believe that God loves Muslims and Christians alike. Remember that Abraham had two sons. God chose to bless them both. The Apostle Paul said: A man could be saved by his wife who is a believer in Christ. If God gives me a Muslim husband to love, I will love him and be his wife. The word of God says,”I will also bless the foreigners who commit themselves to the Lord. Who serve Him and love His name, who worship Him…and who hold fast to My covenant. I will bring them to My holy mountain of Jerusalem and will fill them with joy in my house of prayer…for the Sovereign Lord who brings back the outcasts…says: I will bring others, too, besides My people Israel(Isaiah 57:6-8).” Christ is my Lord and Savior and I love Muslim people:)
—Jewel_Opalenik on 1/11/09
Tish, the command is, “Do not be unequally yoked together with nonbelievers.” Because a nonbeliever’s heart is exceedingly kind is not enough, it is not enough to keep the second commandment of loving your neighbor as yourself, but also the soul must keep the first commandment and accept Christ and worship him as their Lord God in Spirit and in truth. For hell runs over with “nice” people who are idolaters and reject Christ.
—Eloy on 1/8/09
I’m talking to a guy who is a Muslim and his heart is so great. See, I dated a Christian for 3 years and the way he treated me compared to this new guy, was horrific! Not to say I ran into a muslim guys arm but he was there for me when I needed. He encourages me and accepts me as I am. Though I will never commit apostasy against Jesus Christ and I feel called to become a minister, It really sucks that Christians will never give me a chance because he is muslim but having met and been accepted by his mother, it goes to show how backwards Christians can be some time. We preach about accepting and then shun. I’m not sure about marriage as yet, God’s will be done
—tish on 1/7/09
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P.s. Allah is Arabic for God.
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath (James 1:19)It wouldn’t hurt to be a little bit more understanding and have a bit more tolerance 🙂
—tish on 1/7/09
Example1: in the past, a lot of jewish were killed in europe due to the inquisition. Theyve been to muslim countries who protected them. Example2: during the II WW as everybody knows a lot of jewish people were killed in europe by nazis people. lots of countries sent them to germany to be killed (ex:france). The only country which refused was “Turkey”. they propose to jewish to come. example3: (from711-1492) muslims were in spain. they protected jewish and christian. […]
—yk on 3/19/08
Than why did the Turks invaided assyria and raped the women and killed whoever that didnt convert 2 islam???
Some islams in lebanon think Christains are a sin to them!!!
—Nas on 11/9/08
Many people think that christians are worse than muslims.But I say that the soul purpose of the socalled religion Islam is to breed as much as possible in your life time spread all over the world try to convert others and wadge Jihad against non muslims.Prophet Mohommed himself is responsible for millions of lives throught the history(may pease be aporn him) for peraching Islam the religion of peace.
—priyath on 3/25/08
If christians are allowed to marry muslims so should the muslims be allowed to marry christians. It’s all about demographics The challenge to become the religion with most number of followers.The hypocracy of the muslims is unbeliveable.While Muslims live freely in non muslim countries they are silet about the plight of the poor christians living in their home countries
(Pakisthan,Indonesia,Turky,Iraq etc)
—priyath on 3/25/08
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there are a lot of muslim people in europe and lots of marriage between muslim and christian people. i have in my family christian, muslim guys. someone in this blog wrote that islam and christian are totally different because in islam, the muslim kill people who are not muslim. it is totally wrong. i advice everybody to open a history book and read before saying such stupid things. […]
—yk on 3/19/08
Example1: in the past, a lot of jewish were killed in europe due to the inquisition. Theyve been to muslim countries who protected them. Example2: during the II WW as everybody knows a lot of jewish people were killed in europe by nazis people. lots of countries sent them to germany to be killed (ex:france). The only country which refused was “Turkey”. they propose to jewish to come. example3: (from711-1492) muslims were in spain. they protected jewish and christian. […]
—yk on 3/19/08
Example4: One of the fact that explains that islam spread out quickly during the middle-age is that muslim people did not spent all their time killing non muslim people. Exemple5: the war between protestant and catholic with a lot of victims (St barthelemy in France). Exemple6:the long list of people which were killed by christian during the colonization or the inquisition, etc. history gives a lot of examples of how stupid some (christian as muslim) people can be. […]
—yk on 3/19/08
in muslim countries,you still have non-muslim people(example: lebanon).the issue nowadays is that you have few groups(al-kaida)which are trying to impose their point of view.it doesn’t matter who is killed (muslim, christian,etc).[…]
—yk on 3/19/08
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I’m Muslim + my Father, mother=Christian. We’ve never had problems together.FACTS: Muslims believe in same 1 God as the Jews & Christians, Allah is Arabic for God.Muslims believe in & love Jesus & he will be back to lead us all. Muslims believe in the same prophets as Jews & Christians e.g. Adam,Moses,Jonah,John(etc).Muslims regard Muslims, Jews and Christians as “people of the book” fellow believers of the one true faith.
—Amir on 12/17/07
We must not assume that all Muslims are racist, liars, or terrorists. There is good and bad in every religious group. We have had people be racist, lie, and terrorize others all under the name of Christianity. We do not have to downgrade people in other associations of faith in order to give God and Jesus glory. That being said, I think marrying a Muslim as a Christian could be creating your own personal stumbling block.
—joy on 9/21/07
1) speculation???
Lori,I don’t speculate.I only present the undisputed facts.It is a fact that Jesus did not speak the English language which did not exist during his lifetime on earth.It is a fact Jesus spoke Aramaic.The Aramaic word for God is Alah(AaLaH) and Alaha.Please consult and read any Aramaic glossary,dictionary or lexicon-concordance.
—Lari_S on 9/3/07
2) Since Jesus spoke Aramaic and not English, I will quote from the Aramaic Bible(NT). In Luke 6:12, Jesus prayed to Alah-Alaha all night long.
Luke 6:12 “And in those days, Yeshua retired to a mountain to pray, and he passed the night there, in prayer to Alaha.”
—Lari_S on 9/3/07
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rita. well said. exactly.
—lori on 9/2/07
Would you marry a false prophet or anti-christ? The two religions are completely incompatable. Muslims believe that they must kill infedels(nonbelievers of the Islamic religion)in order to maintain right standing with their God Alah. A Christian is definitely an infedel (non-believer of Islam). Our Christian Bible tells us to not be unequally yoked with a nonbeliever. This is not only a nonbeliever, he/she is the spirit of anti-Christ who we are to stay away from. Hope you make the correct decision.
—jody_martin on 9/2/07
Ahmed the bible states that we must not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. Unbelievers means absolutely anyone who is not a Christian. As you state, the reason that Islam allows Muslim men to marry non muslim women is because the female will then have to ‘convert’ and bring up all children as muslims. If she doesn’t convert her life will be intolerable. If they allowed a muslim woman to marry a non muslim man they fear they will lose the next generation of children to something other than Islam.
—RitaH on 9/2/07
Ok Laris. you made a statement, now take your KJV of the bible and show me the referance, chapter and verse where Jesus said he also believes in allah. when you do that, then I will accept what you say. if you can’t it is speculation on your part and false. I will be waiting to see your response.
—Lori on 9/1/07
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I am an African American Muslim male. Islam doesn’t prohibit us from marrying a Christian female but it does frown upon our women marrying non-Muslim males. Why? It is about children. Where in the Bible does it prohit Christians marrying other religions?
—Ahmad on 9/1/07
“muslims believe in Allah, NOT Jesus Christ.”-Lori
Lori, Jesus also believed in Allah(AalaH) as do Arab speaking Christians and Jews.
—Lari_S on 8/31/07
Before the Lord Jesus was born to Mary…He existed as THE WORD (LOGOS) the 2nd person of the Tri-une Godhead. ONE GOD revealed in 3 persons. Not 3 gods. Mohammad said that he “had been ordered to WAGE WAR against ALL NON-MUSLIMS (aka non-believers) until they acknowledge Allah as god, Mohammad as his messenger, pay a heavy tax, and feel themselves subdued.”
—Toto on 8/31/07
The penalty for fighting back against Islam is (according to the Qur’an Sura 5:33) “ONLY THIS that they be murdered, crucified, or have opposing hands and feet cut off…” Islam is NOT what we are told in the West. Start investigating BOTH pro & con of Islam and see for yourselves. Study Dhimmitude too!
—Toto on 8/31/07
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whatever you sow in life, you will also reap. If someone is warned about the dangers and then chooses to ignor those warnings and does something anyways, you have made your choice. regardless how bad things get, you have only yourself to blame. muslims believe in Allah, NOT Jesus Christ. Sometimes you must get burned to know flames are dangerous. Sorry if I am not sympathetic, but I never support stupidity from those who know better.
—Lori on 8/31/07
I am a christian woman now fighting for my life. My muslim husband is trying to take our baby from me. He has made false claims of child abuse, among other tings. Why? Muslims are allowed to lie, if it is for a greater good. That greater good is Islam, and his son being raised as a muslim. I pray every single day for God to grant me a way out of this misery. If you marry this man,you will regret it. Please run, and never ever look back.
—M on 8/30/07
I agree with the Moderator.You are not a Christian because you are from a Christian home.You are a Chrisitan because you believe The truth that Jesus Christ is the Son Of The Living God.That is the Word of God.That is the Truth.Muslims strongly disagree with this truth.As for me,I can never think dating a muslim not to mention marrying her.True friends have the same enemies.I can never marry any enemy of the Truth that sets me free.
—bosun_Abuja-Nigeria on 8/17/07
Virginia: you contradicted everything you said. you say you are a christian but don’t believe Jesus Christ is the son of God. sorry, but you are WRONG. when was the last time you commanded the elements and it was done. when did you raise the dead, walk on water, die and take upon yourself the sins of mankind and were resurrected. Only Jesus Christ did that, no one else. Is Jesus a part of God. Yes, he is his son and if you read the bible, you would know that.
—Lori on 8/17/07
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con’t. if you want to marry a man from the muslim faith, I hope you have studied it in detail. anyone can lie and deceive others. are you prepared to kneel at his feet and worship him, give up freedoms you now enjoy and support terrorism if he chooses that. you have to support him in every way. if you don’t you can be beaten, abused and treated like dirt. things may appear wonderful at the moment, but the second you marry him, you kiss your freedom goodbye and become nothing more than an object he owns.
—Lori on 8/17/07
Yogi…NOTHING is created by mother nature!!!
John 1:3
All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made.
John 1:10
He was in the world, and the world was made through Him, and the world did not know Him.
Colossians 1:16
For by Him all things were created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created through Him and for Him.
Him = Jesus
—Holly4jc on 8/17/07
i have a muslium boyfriend and we are thinking about marriage, i am a christian and i believe that Jesus is not God’s actuall born son, but apart of God, and musliums believe that Jesus is apart of God, and that’s okay..so maybe do a little research, every muslium has their own beliefs so find out and then make your own decision. Who are we to tell others what they should take from the Bible? Educate yourself, then make your own decisions.
—virginia on 8/17/07
Why would someone who claims to love the Lord and accepts Jesus Christ into their heart and lives want to marry someone who doesn’t even believe that Jesus is God? That makes absolutely no sense to me….marrying someone who is also predjusticed against other races is totally contrary to Scripture so if that is what you’re thinking of doing then I would sit down and start reading what the Bible says, my friend!
—fran6775 on 4/28/07
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A born-again Christian can only ever marry another born-again Christian.
—Helen_5378 on 10/17/06
No. Christians and Muslims should not marry. There is no common ground. When Muslims say that God has no son that totally closes the door. I think Jesus must feel left out with that attitude. The more I hear about Muslims the more I feel like a racist – and I do not want to be like that. God did say He loved the world so much that He sent His Son to die for it. If we were forced to live the Muslim way – with no Saviour – what then ?
—Terry on 10/16/06
Can a follower of Christ marry a Muslim? Absolutely not!
—Kay on 10/16/06
So marriage between cristians and Muslims or Hindus etcc…is not a big deal if one understands the following Thinking…
After experimenting with more 1000s of people and with my 45 years of experince, I have come to this conclusion.After all, every human brain is like a massive parallel computer chips and works like that , we have some additional instincts created by MOTHER NATURE, All our beliefs,good or bad,religions, etcc.. are as per what is programmed i.e. what is learnt over period of time.
—yogi on 7/31/06
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I understand the huge differences there are between Christians and Muslims. But is Christian love just about loving ‘Christians’??? Did Christ ask people to be Christians before He could love them? And why do we tend to forget that we cannot judge people…Living with a Muslim spouse can be a the most difficult thing for a Christian, but what if that Christian is an instrument of changing a life, giving his/ her spouse the opportunity to know Christ?
Moderator – Sana, the scriptures are clear that Christians are not to be unequally yoked.
—sana on 4/24/06
lt all depends l was born from a very strong muslim background when l married my husband 18yrs ago he was the one who let me know about Jesus and without pressure l accept HIM as my lord and saviour l love Jesus,if my husband did not marry me may be who knows l may not know my Lord&Master brothers can marry muslims l am destined to be a testimony praise God
—AYOBAMI on 8/1/05
If you think you can marry him then convert him you aren’t thinking clearly. He’s going to see all your flaws and have a host of new reasons that Christianity isn’t right based on those alone.
The differences in your religion will cause friction at the least.
You can marry a Muslim but it’s a cheap imitation of the joy God intends for you to have in a Christian marriage.
I wouldn’t settle for anything less then a Christian marriage knowing what I know now.
—Pharisee on 7/31/05
Yes, if the Christianity one is having is in “name” only. But if being a Christian is exercised in words and in deeds, I don’t think that any Christian would ever think of marrying a Muslim. The belief systems are different from each other. Conflict could not be prevented to arise. No one in their right mind would want a marriage filled with conflicts.
—bebet3754 on 7/31/05
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“Can” or “May”? They can, but shouldn’t. It’s a “lose-lose” situation. And, bottom line, it’s not scriptual, read: 2 Corinthians 6:14. At most, you would just be exsisting together – once the harmones calm down, you would have very little to share, (i.e. you couldn’t pray together, go to church together, fellowhip with other Christians together, etc.) To make matters worse, if you ever had children they would raised muslim. (Even if you objected!)
—Ray on 7/31/05
you’re asking for the distinction between christianity and islam. if you want a good marriage, if you were to compromise your faith then this person would lose respect for you and probably for the God you serve. but even if you never did and you were never convicted in faith it would still hurt the otherto know your spouse can’t pray with you or worship or do any of the most intimate Godly things he intended in a marriage. there is more to it than sex. God wants all of you too.
—matthew on 7/31/05
As Moderator said, “not if they want to follow the Bible.” The Apostle Paul clearly instructs us to “be not unequally yoked,” and this would be as unequally yoked as a christian could get, because Muslims DO NOT worship the same God that we as christians do.
—tommy3007 on 7/31/05
From the Daily Mail:
The devastated family of the wife of Boston bomber Tamerlan Tsarnaev say ‘our hearts are sickened’ by the terror and tragedy the young Chechen unleashed on America.
Tsarnaev has a three-year-old daughter called Zahara with Katherine Russell, 24, who converted to Islam for her husband, MailOnline can reveal.
And tonight, Katherine’s parents, Judith and Warren issued an emotional statement following the terror attack that left three dead and 176 injured, saying: ‘Our daughter has lost her husband today, the father of her child.
‘We cannot begin to comprehend how this horrible tragedy occurred. In the aftermath of the Patriot’s Day horror, we know that we never really knew Tamerlane Tsarnaev.
‘Our hearts are sickened by the knowledge of the horror he has inflicted.’
This is what happens when you have no firm belief structure. So, the guy is cute and, hell, all religions are the same and he is awful cute and all … so sure, Allah Ahkbar and hand me a hijab.
These people did not know Tamerlan Tsarnaev and they did not know Islam.
Ignorance is not bliss.
“Love doesnt conquer all”.
I fell in love for a muslim guy years ago. It was a beautiful story with a hurtful end. I am cristian American and
My parents are from argentina. he was palestinian/jordanian. His family was against the relationship my parents were supportive. He used to call me wife and we were both in love. After 2 years he broke up with me. I was devastated and humiliating. He told me he would love me until the end of his days. It was his choice to break up. I moved on. After 6 months I met my now husband who is JewishWe dated 2 years and we got married. I am raising my 2 kids in the Jewish religion. I got lucky to have a supportive husband and conversion was never a subject. My ex ended up marrying a cousin. He seems very happy. I was naive and he used me. I just wished he had told me that he never really loved me first place. He never did. My husband in other hand has stood up and is a wonderful man to me. I was a lucky one.
i am against other religion’s marriage it sucks… we are never will be ready for that… get over it people! period.
‘Westernised’ girl killed by Muslim father
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Killed: Heshu Yones
A Muslim teenage girl murdered in an “honour killing” was the victim of a clash of cultures, police said today.
Strict Kurdish Muslim Abdalla Yones cut the throat of his 16-year-old daughter Heshu because he believed she had become too westernised.
He was jailed for life today after admitting the murder of A-level student Heshu, who had planned to run away from home after starting a relationship with an 18-year-old Lebanese Christian boy.
Police said she appeared to have been the victim of serious domestic violence before the murder.
And they revealed a letter which Heshu wrote to her parents, apparently just days before she planned to run away.
It read: “Bye Dad, sorry I was so much trouble. “Me and you will probably never understand each other, but I’m sorry I wasn’t what you wanted, but there’s some things you can’t change.
“Hey, for an older man you have a good strong punch and kick.
“I hope you enjoyed testing your strength on me, it was fun being on the receiving end. Well done.”
Yones, 48, a political refugee who had fled the brutality of Saddam Hussein’s regime in Iraq 10 years ago, was the first person to plead guilty to murder in a so-called honour killing case.
Police believe there were 12 such killings in Britain last year, including six in London, and have vowed to investigate other members of the community who may have colluded to help cover up the death.
Yones tried to kill himself immediately after the murder by cutting his own throat and then throwing himself from a third floor balcony at the family home in Acton, west London, on October 12 last year.
He initially claimed members of al Qaida had broken into his home, killed his daughter and attacked him before throwing him over the balcony.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-197856/Westernised-girl-killed-Muslim-father.html#ixzz2RPd792Fs
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this story is is really bad
the Islamic marriage is based on acceptance and publicity this means the civil marriage is a correct muslim marriage the modern formalities are not basics they are modern habits “inventions”.
they got married she is his wife and he is her husband everybody should keep his opinion to him self families has no right to interfere like that.
I am not an expert in christian point of view but i believe that marriage is not a piece of paper its 2 persons that want to make a life together and this is there own business.
how people get married if there is no “Maazone for muslims ” or “church for Christians” on an island or on a boat or whatever they get help from who ever can help them and get married this is what they did in Cyprus.
I hope people stop these stupid ideas that makes life harder for no real reason.
to home who like to make life hard … STOP IT Let people live there lives we only live once.
I see too much hate in the replies .
I hope one day the humans will understand that we are all the same
we are all Humans
same God created all of us and he created us as humans
why cant we accept each other as we are
why people talk about ” converting ” why cant we accept others as they are
why do you always think we you right and anybody different is wrong. dont you ever think that doing that makes you wrong. I am Muslim and my family name is Eissa “Jesus in Arabic ” we love and respect Jesus yes we Muslims think he is prophet of God with a massage to Humans which is not far from the christian believes as Jesus came to us with a message a massage of Love not a massage of hate.
yes there are bad people in all religions and all nationalities but that dose not mean that we should all hate each other.
we are all the same this is the truth believe it or not its your choice.
Lets see if you share the same opinion if your sister wanted to marry someone outside of the faith. Your only feeding us wolf in sheep clothing agendas for us because its a Muslim man with a Non-Muslim woman. So actions speak louder than words. I agree with your notion but its double bladed in its scope & nature. You encourage your imams & sheiks to not see Non-Muslims & minority Muslim groups such as Druze & Alawites as not Dhimis. Furthermore I want peace on this planet & I feel it can only be achieved if all parties stop feeding us lies, persecuting others for opinions or views, stoping others from searching their own destinys, allowing everyone to live as humans, learning to accept our faults in history, nations & as individuals. Once we can acknowledge that we have not only sinned but been involved in crimes, except for justifying such evil otracities or acts on the individual or nation then we can rethink about moving on & forgiveness.
Your parents are right in washing their hands and telling you to lie in the bed you made for yourself. People have to learn from their mistakes. However, if you were my daughter I would tell you leave this man today. He already pronounced talaq, which although to you means nothing to him it means divorce and that is final. The legalities are just formalities for him. If I were you I would jump up and down with joy. File for divorce and get out of this abusive relationship with this neanderthal now. Kick him out of the house and change the locks or even move to another place where he can’t find you.
It is possible that once he realizes he is going to lose you, and if he still thinks he needs you and has not taken full advantage of you, he may come begging you to take him back. Don’t be fooled again.
Young people give too much importance to love. The truth is that love is very transient. You will feel sad for a few days but it will pass sooner than you think. Go out and find friends. Join dancing classes, cooking classes, or become a volunteer. Just don’t sit at home. Get out and do something. Twenty four is too young for marriage. You have plenty of time to find your soul mate and create a happy family. Ten years from now, when you have a career, a loving husband and a couple of adorable children you may think about now and smile, thanking God for pulling you out of this mess.
Write in the comments. There are other women who have been in your situation. They will leave their comments and you won’t feel lonely. I am also going to revive the forum of faithfreedom.org where we had a section dedicated to women married to Muslim men.
Be happy. Getting rid of this man is the best thing that could have happen to you. Don’t worry about helping him. You can’t help those who don’t want to be helped. Go to your church when no one is there, sit on your knees and say, Jesus, I have come back to you, please accept me.. Then walk out with confidence and assurance that you are in safe hands. Go to your parents or call them and tell them you made a mistake and now you have come to your senses and want to walk in the light.
Finish your studies first. There is no rush to get married. Muslim men shatter the confidence of their women. This is the first thing they do to control them. Regain your confidence. Future is all yours.
Beirut – Grotesque. Unprecedented. Bizarre. Though true, the journalists’ adjectives cannot quite define the latest excess of a Muslim court. Yet Mona Ghalib’s voice was determined down the phone line from her exile in the United States. What else would you expect from a Muslim woman whose Lebanese Christian husband is waiting to be flogged after legal sentencing in the Gulf for the “offence” of marrying her?
“When I sleep – if I can sleep – all I see is the sight of my husband being whipped,” Mrs Ghalib told me yesterday
“I know my marriage was legal in 1995. We have the official papers from Lebanon where we were married in St John’s Church in Jbeil. But the court in the United Arab Emirates has sentenced him to 39 lashes. This is not Islamic law.”
Alas for Mrs Ghalib, it appears to be the law in the impoverished emirate of Ras al-Ain.
Elie Dib Ghalib, a Christian Maronite from northern Lebanon faces the lash for his marriage in June of last year to Mona Junaidi, a 25-year old Yemeni-born citizen of the Emirates who studies at Francis Marion University in South Carolina.
The couple met 10 years ago at the Intercontinental Hotel in Al-Ain where her future husband was – and remained until his arrest – the restaurant manager. “Even when I called my husband’s defence lawyer, he wouldn’t talk to me,” Mrs Ghalib says, the indignation in her voice scarcely suppressed. “He said `Why are you calling me? You’re not his wife any more.’ I could not believe it.”
It is only a few months since an Egyptian court ordered a university professor and his wife to divorce on the grounds that his Islamic research work constituted “apostasy”
But the Ghalibs have neither the power nor the influence to stand up to a government in the Arab Gulf. Mr Ghalib was helping to finance his wife’s university course but, she says, she has now been forced to sleep in churches and friends’ homes for lack of funds. Her personal appeal to Sheikh Zayed bin Sultan Al Nahyan – the fabulously wealthy Emirates ruler – for a pardon for her husband has gone unanswered. “When I ask the Emirates embassy here for help, all they could offer was a one-way ticket back to the Emirates. If I took that, I’d go back and receive the death penalty.”
Under Islamic sharia law, a non-Muslim man may not marry a Muslim woman unless he converts to Islam – something Mr Ghalib has reportedly offered to do in prison – but Mrs Ghalib is in little doubt as to what lies behind this most disgraceful of judgments.
“I’m from Yemen and wasn’t born in the Emirates, where they wouldn’t dare touch the big families. The purpose of punishing my husband for marrying me is to tell all the other Muslim women in the emirates `if you have it in mind to marry a Christian, we don’t want you to have the courage or the guts to do it’.”
Since her husband’s arrest, Mrs Ghalib has been studying Islamic law interpreted by scholars of Al Azhar university in Cairo. “Islamic law doesn’t say that a husband must be beaten or flogged. God loves all of us.”
Amnesty International believes he has already been whipped several times during interrogation.
Mrs Ghalib said: “He has called a couple of times from prison, just for two minutes. I can hear yelling and screaming in the background. His voice has changed.”
Wow this is really interesting
I came from a Greek Orthodox background an only child , my husband a lebanese Muslim sunni we have been married for 23 years together for 29 we had a registry wedding and a Islamic religious ceremony ,
My parents were not present at the Islamic ceremony as I did not tell them . They were not happy at first but as they got to know my husband they loved him like a son and my father and him spend everyday together , we had 2 children and both were bought up as Muslims , we attend my families Christmas and Easter functions and my husband is beside me, He respects my families customs and traditions and same goes for me with his family
When it comes to our daughters we will have the Islamic ceremony in a garden and my husband will walk his
Daughters down the isle it is what my husband wants
I have been blessed !! we fought hard to be where we are now
At the end of the day if you want something to work you have to pout your heart and soul into it and do not give up..
And Chrissy seriously what century are you living in
The Greeks in Greece and the Turks are marrying get over it and move on
So your husband has brainwashed you to the point whereby he even lied about your Islamic ceremony to the family. You want to know what that means baby, that he hasn’t got the guts or the moral fibre to tell them his agenda. You fell for it because he persuaded you & you being a female put up with it, because you were deeply in love as you put it. If he had nothing to hide with his alterior motives, why didn’t he confront your family or you do so. It means he didn’t & it proves his conscience got the better of him so he made it all up by spending time with your traditions. But do they actually go to a church to practice Christmas or Easter, the answer is no. His a wolf in sheep clothing because he gives the agenda that his good but deep down its to hide the real horror. It’s proven because you’ve submitted to his will to let the daughters be married in Islamic tradition. This is not interfaith marriage it’s a disguise to implement there supremacy agenda. He only gives up a little to make it all seem fair on surface. It’s only worked in your case, because you’ve accepted with no question.
In regards to your later comment forgiveness begins with confession & are Turks willing to confess there evils, the answer will surprise you in no. That’s the big difference between German & Turks. It’s illegal in Germany to deny Jewish massacres. On Turks it’s illegal to acknowledge there massacres of Christians (Armenians & Greeks) if your so good, read on how they were treated & what equality they had called a Dimi a free slave. They only get married to Christian to increase Islamic #’s. if your daughter wanted to get married to a Greek Orthodox you’ll see him & his wolf teeth. He won’t tolerate it.
Bashir you are a very ignorant person, both daughters went to private Greek Orthodox schools speak greek fluently and both were taught about the religion, they both went to church with their grandmother and myself on Easter and any other religious occasion their father has never stopped them nor will he ever
I am the one who chose not to marry in a greek church ,. My daughters can marry whoever they want and one is currently seeing an australian boy and my husband approves of him he is not expecting him to convert to islam …
In my family we have choices
You have choice because we allow choice. Muslims exploit choice to there own benefit. You had a choice, that proves what sort of person you are, & that’s a person that sold out the Greek Massacres for your sexual gratification because he was attractive. I’ll unfold everything because I see things deeply than you. Everything all factors are taken into account. Which you obviously didn’t do, so good luck in trying to make out its all fair when it isn’t.
You don’t want them married in a Greek. Church, that tells me everything you said was a lie. You’ve converted to Islam & your so brainwashed by your husband even he is telling you the answers. You cannot win, think before you write. So your ashamed by Christianity are you, are you ashamed of your history & culture?
Furthermore, why are you dictating there choices for your daughters when you clearly had a choice to marry this Muslim. So your a hypocrite!!!
He only has brothers and yes 3 of his female cousins have married outside islam
I chose to hide it from my mother was religious but my father was not
And don’t get me wrong there are family members on both sides that do not agree with our ways but its our life and we don’t live for what people think
Another thing his family came to this country in the early 50s and are very highly respected amongst the Christian and Islamic communities
Dear Bashir,
I hope that God brings light to your life because you are one of the reasons that Lebanon will never know peace. I am a catholic girl dating a Sunni man. He is the love of my life and I would do anything for him as he would for me. Our parents are not accepting but I pray everyday that their love for us will be greater than their pride. It brings hope to my heart reading all the positive comments because I am a strong believer that love d
Dear Bashir,
I pray to God that be brings light into your life because you are one of the reasons that Lebanon will never have peace.
I am a catholic girl who is dating a sunni man. He is the love of my life and I would do anything for him. Our parents are not accepting especially mine but I pray everyday that their love for me will be stronger than their pride because it is a matter of pride and reputation to them which I do not approve at all. For people will talk about you no matter what you do in your life.
The positive comments bring hope to my heart and I will remain a strong believer that love does conquer all. Marriage on paper does not matter at all. Whether muslim, christian or civil; which are all merely formalities.
I hope that this thread continues to post positive comments and I will continue to ignore negative comments as negative energy breeds negative outcomes.
Much Love,
A
A whore like myself? You just made my day and I truely hope that God forgives you. You are not worthy of a reply but you just made this all easier for me! Say what you want, God is the only judge here my friend.
Peace