Ivy Says

I probably should have published this a little earlier since January is almost over, but you know… I couldn’t. I couldn’t because I’ve been overwhelmed with the both the necessary and the mundane tasks of being not just a mom of two, but rather an adult juggling family life and work. It hasn’t been an easy year for me, no matter how effortless or breezy Instagram makes it look; though I’ve been quite careful and conscious about always passing that “real” message across to my readers. And still, sometimes things may come off as being a little more on the ideal side. But 2018 was a year of hard lessons for me. And I hope that if I write down my goals like I do every year, I’ll use this list to hold myself accountable, (since its now public); but most of all I hope this can inspire some of you who need motivation or feel a little “stuck’ as many of us do sometimes.

1. Worry Less

I know this seems a little minor. It’s not. I can’t begin to tell you how much self-harm and stress worry can bring about. I literally worry about EVERYTHING, sometimes these worries are fully warranted and other times they are a result of letting my anxiety get the best of me. I somehow managed to convince myself that being too mindful or foreseeing things that could one day become issues would somehow help me prevent them. What I failed to see is that I’ve created them in this process and that has affected me in more ways than I wanted to admit. I worry about being a good mother, how healthy and well-fed my kids are, are they happy? Am I working out enough? Am I eating right? Why didn’t I get that campaign? Am posting enough photos? Is my content interesting? The thing is, even when things are on track I start looking for reasons to worry, and this has taken a toll on me. So, I’ve decided to cut myself some slack this year, stop trying to seek perfection and accept that sometimes I have to just be present, that I’m only human and I’m allowed a break. So I’m going to take the time to relax a little more, and feed my kids delivery if I have to and accept that there will be days were they won’t go to bed at 7pm and that’s okay and that I don’t have to put out 7 posts a week and my followers will still accept me and like me for who I am.

2. Write More

I’ve been discussing this on my stories a lot and every time I do I can’t believe how many messages I get from people who have been following me way before the term Influencer was created, when subscribing to blogs for daily updates was a thing people enjoyed rather than scrolling infinitely through feeds of perfectly staged moments that don’t really add value to your life. And you might say, but people don’t want to read anymore, they want visual content, pictures and videos. That’s true. And for a while I fed that beast what it wanted. But it didn’t better me or make me feel good about myself in any way. Sure, it got me more popular with a larger (younger) demographic and brands that only care about numbers of likes, but that’s not true influence. That’s not what’s going to resonate with people. Writing is my calling. It’s my happy place. It’s where I get to put the real piece of me out there, and know that people reading this are enjoying it, someone cares about what I have to say, and the my words may add something of value or be positive to their lives, that to me is real influence.

3. Be Unapologetically Myself

Many people who know me personally know that I’m honest, at times quite straight forward. And my outspokenness has gotten me in some trouble in the past. Over the years, I’ve learned that sometimes too much honesty can make a certain type of people uncomfortable, so I decided to carefully filter my words and become more selective with the people who deserve my honesty. But I realized that wasn’t going to work for me either because some people would much rather have a superficial relationship and discuss the things they dislike about you behind your back. And that’s alright. To each their own. And although I’ve sharpened my diplomacy skills, I’ve also decided in my 30’s that life is too short to make such an effort and walk around eggs shells. No matter what you do, some people will insist on categorizing you and misunderstanding you. You don’t have to change for them. Let them be them and you be you.

4. De-Clutter

I’ve actually cheated with this one a little and began this process at the end of 2018. By decluttering I don’t mean just junk around the house, I mean everything, kitchen appliances, clothes, shoes, makeup, books, papers anything! I literally went around each area of our home, and began opening drawers and shelves and throwing stuff out or donating them. And it didn’t have to be old stuff, just stuff that were excessive that I had no real use for. The more I would cast away, the freer I felt, the less chained down I was by material things. I started feeling more at peace in my surroundings and this feeling became addictive. I plan on doing this at least once every month.

5. Take Better Care of my Health

Yes work outs are good for my well-being, but this year I need to stop avoiding all those health check ups. Nobody likes going to the doctor, but I’m starting to become borderline negligent. I need to get so many things checked and do a couple of blood tests because I haven’t been feeling that healthy or energetic on some days, it could be the lack of sleep or vitamins but I’m going to finally listen to my mother and go. Next month…

6. Travel to a Place I Haven’t Been

I know this is so cliche. But here’s the thing, I’m not very adventurous, I like to go with what I know and be comfortable. Paris, Italy, Spain, US, the usual. I know that there is so much more to the world than these typically popular destinations (which I love) but I should get out of my comfort zone and visit somewhere new, ( hopefully not too tropical, good hotels no insects or conflict zones.)

7. Partner Up With More Brands I Love

I’ve also cheated and kick started this in 2018. This doesn’t mean that I haven’t partnered up with brands I love and believe in. This just means that I’m going to be even more selective than I have been in 2018. In a market flooded with Influencers it’s no surprise that collaborations are not as abundant as they were 3 years ago. And as tempting it may be, this has not stopped me from being true to myself and my readers as I continue to respectfully decline many opportunities that just don’t feel like a good fit for me and come off as too sponsored or not relevant which I feel could be betraying the trust of my followers. It’s a tough balance to strike believe me; but I promise to always chose carefully and believe in something 100% before endorsing it to anyone. So thank you to both my readers and the brands for the trust you’ve put in me, for going out and trying the things that I recommend and for allowing me to pursue a career I love since 2009.

Photo Credit- Qatar Airways Premium Lounge