Tag Archives: women

Elissa Falls Victim To Domestic Violence

Elissa Ya Merayti video

As much as I’d like to appreciate and enjoy Arabic music I don’t. With the exception of the occasional classics played at weddings when you’re too tipsy to care anymore and make you want to pull out those moves you learned at those two belly dancing classes you took back in high school. I’m also appalled by most video clips that accompany Arabic songs, they’re usually cheap, vulgar, abundant with clichés and ripped off.

Having said that, I came across the new music video of Lebanese songstress Elissa’s latest song Ya Merayti (My Mirror) this weekend and I was immediately drawn to both the production and powerful message it portrays.

Directed by Angie Jammal, the story tells the all too common tale of a wife and mother who is a victim of domestic violence, a shamefully widespread issue in Lebanon, according to local NGO and strongest advocate on the matter, KAFA, -25 women reported to have been killed by family members between 2010 and 2013 and four deaths occurred as a result in 2014-and that’s only what’s been reported, because most women don’t come forward or live to tell their story. Worse yet , the criminalization of marital rape has not been included in any legislation to date. Awful…

Now as much as we tend to hear about this in our 8pm evening news bulletins, the impact is much stronger when millions of fans and followers of Elissa in Lebanon and around the world get to watch her over and over again as a victim herself, portraying the sad reality of a struggling mother who suffers the fate of an abusive violent husband, one who beats her until the brink of death. But her story comes with the message of hope and action, and will resonate loudly and powerfully I’m sure in the many minds of women who today suffer in silence and encourage them to come forward.

Elissa Ya Merayti video 2

The video was shot on location in Serbia, and could have easily been yet another opportunity for the singer to simply show off her  beauty, style and vocal cords. But it wasn’t. So thank you Elissa, for taking the high road and choosing to bring awareness to domestic violence, in what obviously is a high quality and budget production to promote and shed more light on this dire matter. RESPECT

Watch the video below and let me know your thoughts…

Barbra Streisand and Elissa- Separated At Birth

Nancy or Elissa; Who Wore It Best?

Lebanese Singer Channels Her Inner Britney

10 Tips To Becoming A Happier Person

ten tips to becoming a happier person by ivy says

1. Drop a grudge. It doesn’t mean you should befriend someone who hurt you it just means you should rid yourself of the hatred you’re harboring. It takes up too much energy. Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will die.

2. Quit your job. especially if you hate it so much. No plan B? Yeah that happens too. Something better will come along, trust me on this one.

3.Get a pet. even if you grew up in a house that absolutely forbade them. They really are the gift that keeps on giving, provided you train them well. The sheer joy and comical behavior and most importantly unconditional friendship that comes with owning one can is priceless, any god pet owner can attest to that.

get a pet

4. Take up an exercise class; Yoga, Pilates, Zumba, Trampoline, Body Pump anything that requires you to establish a healthy routine and allows you to get moving. It’s not just about getting fit, it’s about dedication and a sense of community. Even when you don’t know anyone in the class, you are all still feeding off each others energy and working as a team towards a common goal- and that’s well being. There’s also nothing like earning a guilt-free dinner.

take up a class

5. Clean out your closet. Face it, you’re probably never going to wear (or fit in) to that dress from 4 summers ago but every time you open your closet and see it there it makes you feel miserable. Get rid of it and make some room for the new.

6. Get gutsy and get that hairstyle you always wanted but never dared to. Get out of your comfort zone, change things up. If you find your hair dull and boring, then make it exciting and new. It’s a major confidence booster that will suddenly make you want to try out new makeup and new styles.

get a new hairstyle

7. Speaking of makeup, no matter how many “I hate makeup” declarations you’ve made trust me when I tell you it can change your entire perspective and cover up some major flaws you’ve been hating on forever. Have your beauty expert friend take you on a makeup spree, and watch how you will LOVE discovering that there really is a product for every inch of your face- and they work!

makeup shopping

8. Stop seeing the same people. I don’t mean you should stop talking to your friends all together, just widen the circle. Be more sociable in your approach, you’re never too old for new friends.

9. Spoil yourself especially if you work hard. For some that’s a day at the spa for others it’s a handbag with a hefty price tag but either way go for it.

spoil yourself

10. Quit comparing yourself to others. Social media platforms like Instagram and Facebook can be deceiving, and keeping a keen eye on someone’s “perfect” life can make you begin to despise your own.

 

 

 

10 Reasons Why You Should Not Get Married

Divorce

1. You don’t trust each other, even when you’re together. This kind of relationship is toxic-trust me. You know he has a wandering eye but you’re hoping marriage will fix that, because then he’ll only be yours. Nice try… Why spend your life trying to catch him instead of just going with your gut?

2. You can’t agree on anything. You both thought it was cute when you couldn’t decide on which mini-appetizer roles to order, but it’s not that cute anymore when it involves life-altering decisions like whether you want to move to KSA or pull out a mortgage on a house.

3. You’re at that age where your parents would really like to see you married, so they’re putting on the pressure. And you want to make them happy and proud. So you keep ignoring the signs and just settle hoping it will all work out. You just gambled your life, good luck.

4. You’ve succumbed to life-altering decisions because you were over powered. And no I don’t mean you had a gun held to your head, you just couldn’t win the argument so you just gave in to your own unhappiness- for the next fifteen years!

5. You’ve spent so much time together already, sharing your life together doesn’t even sound that appealing anymore to you.  The spark is gone. That’s bad. No matter how long you’ve been together for, you should ALWAYS get excited at the idea of being together-and yes forever. So if that thought makes you queasy, think thrice. 6. You’ve spent so much time together, it’s only correct you do the right thing and tie the knot. Everyone is expecting you to, especially her parents. Otherwise, it will look like you just dated for fun and wasted her time. GASP

7. You already share an apartment, a car and the same friends what’s an official paper going to do right? Well, not if you’re not convinced he/she is your soul mate. Convenience will slowly evolve into burden and misery and only then you’ll realize what that paper really means.

8. You have totally different outlooks/lifestyles. While you want to save up for the yacht and cruise the Mediterranean, your partner wants to grow veggies on a farm and enjoy the simple life. While he wants to travel the world with his hot-shot consulting job you’re happy just having 3 children right way. You want different things from life – the sooner you come to terms with it, the less difficult you make it on each other.

9. You’re constantly trying to change each other. You think he can be more generous and he thinks you spend too much. It’s all fun and games when you’re just dating but unless you accept each other the way you are, your marriage will become a constant barrage. Throw some children in the mix and you can join the divorce statistics.

10. You want to get married your partner doesn’t. So you keep giving him/her the ultimatum until they give in. Is that really how you want to base your marriage, on blackmail? Think long and hard about it. Read More

How To Find Your Soul Mate

5 Reasons You’re Still Single; The Arab Men Edition

6 Reasons Why He Didn’t Call You Back

8 Reasons Why Arab Men Won’t Marry You

What Men Really Want- Especially Lebanese Men

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Women

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits Of Middle Eastern Men

20 Signs You’re Dating An Arab Girl

 

1. She’s the jealous type. The last time a hostess smiled and greeted you at a bar she threatened to “cut her”

shut up

2. The first thing she’ll ask you when she’s sees a pretty girl is “do you think she’s pretty?”

anigif_enhanced-17536-1400711770-1

3. Yet  she’s self-obsessed. You never knew someone could love themselves so much.

attitude

4. She’s constantly complaining. About anything and every little thing. Her life is a series of endless rants.

eye roll

5. You’re constantly reminded that she’s better than you and that you  should be grateful she chose you.

get a life

6. Calling her “not nice” would be the understatement of the year. The girl makes Cruela de Vil deserve a halo.

not dealing with your bullshit

7. According to her and her mother, everyone is jealous… of her.

jealous

8. She’s more judgmental than your 80 year old aunt.

My-Big-Fat-Greek-Wedding-quotes-1

9. Yet she’s a major hypocrite. Apparently nothing applies to her.

hair

10. She hates all her friends. But they have no idea.

stabbing you

11. She hates all your friends. They noticed.

dont care really

12. According to her, if  you really loved her like you said you did, then you would give her all your passwords.

HELLO

13. Tantrums are like second nature to her. She has no problem throwing them anywhere.

flip out

14. And just when you’re about to win a point, she wins by crying.

cry baby

15. She’s constantly bragging about how all the guys want her hand in marriage.

lala

16. But the minute you threaten to leave her she’ll blackmail you with suicide.

suicide

17. Part of loving her, means that you get to spend your entire income on her. Every month.

shopping

 18. She’s always at war with someone.

rude

19. She basks in other people’s misfortunes. You’ve never seen her happier.

happy happy

20. Yet, somehow she’s managed to convince you to make her your wife.

marriage

Read More

30 Thoughts Every Arab Couple Has Before Getting Married

What Men Really Want- Especially Lebanese Men

20 Problems Every Girl Will Face This Summer

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits Of Middle Eastern Men

8 Reasons Why Arab Men Won’t Marry You

 

6 More Arab Crimes Against Beauty

 

 

How To Find Your Soul Mate

soul mate search

Although my Facebook timeline has been flooded with puffy white wedding gowns and cute chubby newborns lately, a portion of my dearest friends (both ladies and gents) are a long way from settling down anytime soon. I say this with confidence because they’re either single and really fed up with mingling or they’re dating someone casually who they would never dream of introducing to the parents.

So you see they’ve settled too, in their own way, either by convincing themselves that they should not bother searching for their Soul Mate anymore, that cuddling is totally overrated and they’re saving their energy for their careers or by pursuing a relationship with a guy/girl who blurts cryptic things like “Marriage is just something society created to organize people”

I’m not going to give you a speech on why you shouldn’t give up ( although you shouldn’t) or reassure you that there is that right person for you out there (I’m a hopeless romantic) I’m just going to share with you a brief list of how you could be enabling yourself from failing to find the right person for you.

1)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by being a bitter pissed off person all the time, going on unwarranted rants online and being generally unkind and rude to others just because you want to come off as strong and invincible. It’s just not attractive.

2)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by carrying excessive baggage from your past breakups and being paranoid and suspicious because you never want to get hurt again so you go on labeling the opposite sex as “cheaters” or “opportunists” and make wild declarations like “I don’t believe in love” to every guy/girl you meet.

3)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by staying in your comfort zone through randomly hooking up with every single guy/girl who’s emotionally unavailable too or by agreeing to an open relationship because you’re scared he/she might leave you otherwise.

4)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by creating all these preposterous credentials you require in a partner before you would even consider dating them like, religion, social status, bank account, height.

5)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by seeking your parent’s approval because no one is truly good enough for you. Or by purposely pursuing someone who lives abroad because you know they’re going to leave eventually.

6)     Speaking of no one is truly good enough for you, I hope you don’t really believe those prep talks. Sure you’re great- in some ways- but you probably have a long list of vices that your better half will have to put up with as well. So take it easy with the whole “no one deserves me” attitude.

6)      You’re not going to find your soul mate because you can’t afford to throw a wedding extravaganza and don’t think anyone will settle for anything less.

7)      And you most definitely will not find your soul mate if you keep posting silly quotes like “I’m single and free and it’s just me ”

All this is not to say that being single isn’t one of the most amazing crucial independent phases in a person’s life, a time where you can create some of the strongest bonds and make the most amazing memories with friends. But just like staying in college for too long, the fun eventually fades. And I am fully aware that not all of us want the same things out of life; like a beautiful house and bouncy babies. I’m just trying to say that maybe you haven’t found your soul mate because maybe just maybe you’ve inadvertently done everything not to be found.

Thoughts?

Also See

8 Reasons Why Arab Men Won’t Marry You

6 Reasons Why He Didn’t Call You Back

What Men Really Want- Especially Lebanese Men

5 Reasons You’re Still Single; The Arab Men Edition-Part I

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits Of Middle Eastern Men

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Women

 

 

 

 

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Women

jasmine

You loved The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Men, and since I’m all for equality this sequel was only fair.

1)      When you first met her at a club she seemed like the most outgoing fun-loving party girl who wanted to grab life by its horns.  She made Lindsay Lohan look like a homebody. Fast forward to two dates later and she’s dropping the “M Bomb” on you. Yes, already. She brought up marriage so casually, practically implying it’s a condition. At this point you’re completely oblivious to the trap she just set for you. You would have agreed to anything just to get some . Now you’re about to drop a hefty down payment for that 700 plus wedding, jokes on you! Muhahahaha

2)      Excessive complaining followed by a chance of tantrum. Just like Australia is known for its Kangaroos, we Middle Eastern women are known for our soap opera-like tantrums when things don’t go our way. As a rule of thumb, NEVER attempt to win an argument; you will be annihilated for the mere act of trying.  And when all else fails- we’ll call in the tears. As soon as you spot them apologize IMMEDIATELY. If you’re not sure apologize anyway.

3)      Zero notion of Time. Fake lash application is more complicated and meticulous than you know. (anyone else can’t get than hang of it?) So If you need to be somewhere at 10pm just subtract that number by 3. So 7pm means 10pm.  2 mean 5. Simple math and no one’s late. I love win wins.

4)      Drama, we live for it, attract it, crave it, create it, and when all else fails, imagine it. Even if it’s a perfectly nice day and you’re having a stroll in her favourite mall, drama still lurks in the shadows. It could her over-protective mother barraging her with calls inquiring about her whereabouts or some random girl shop girl giving her attitude. They ruined her mood and now you and that unsuspecting waitress are going to pay. Brace yourself, put on your headgear and get ready to roll with the punches . Nod and agree (and nod) with everything she says and pray for the shit storm to pass.

5)      Part of what makes you a gentleman is your ability to finance everything. If you don’t then you’re either cheap or poor and both won’t do.  It’s pretty straight forward

6)      No you can not be friends with your ex-girlfriend or any other female friend for that matter even if she’s married with kids. It’s a territorial thing. And all your male friends need to pass a screen test where she will filter them out and decide which ones will do and which will not. No you do not get to have a say.

Did I miss a few?

Also See

What Men Really Want, Especially Lebanese Men

Mes Obsessions Du Jour

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