Tag Archives: women

20 Signs You’re Dating An Arab Girl

 

1. She’s the jealous type. The last time a hostess smiled and greeted you at a bar she threatened to “cut her”

shut up

2. The first thing she’ll ask you when she’s sees a pretty girl is “do you think she’s pretty?”

anigif_enhanced-17536-1400711770-1

3. Yet  she’s self-obsessed. You never knew someone could love themselves so much.

attitude

4. She’s constantly complaining. About anything and every little thing. Her life is a series of endless rants.

eye roll

5. You’re constantly reminded that she’s better than you and that you  should be grateful she chose you.

get a life

6. Calling her “not nice” would be the understatement of the year. The girl makes Cruela de Vil deserve a halo.

not dealing with your bullshit

7. According to her and her mother, everyone is jealous… of her.

jealous

8. She’s more judgmental than your 80 year old aunt.

My-Big-Fat-Greek-Wedding-quotes-1

9. Yet she’s a major hypocrite. Apparently nothing applies to her.

hair

10. She hates all her friends. But they have no idea.

stabbing you

11. She hates all your friends. They noticed.

dont care really

12. According to her, if  you really loved her like you said you did, then you would give her all your passwords.

HELLO

13. Tantrums are like second nature to her. She has no problem throwing them anywhere.

flip out

14. And just when you’re about to win a point, she wins by crying.

cry baby

15. She’s constantly bragging about how all the guys want her hand in marriage.

lala

16. But the minute you threaten to leave her she’ll blackmail you with suicide.

suicide

17. Part of loving her, means that you get to spend your entire income on her. Every month.

shopping

 18. She’s always at war with someone.

rude

19. She basks in other people’s misfortunes. You’ve never seen her happier.

happy happy

20. Yet, somehow she’s managed to convince you to make her your wife.

marriage

Read More

30 Thoughts Every Arab Couple Has Before Getting Married

What Men Really Want- Especially Lebanese Men

20 Problems Every Girl Will Face This Summer

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits Of Middle Eastern Men

8 Reasons Why Arab Men Won’t Marry You

 

6 More Arab Crimes Against Beauty

 

 

About these ads

How To Find Your Soul Mate

soul mate search

Although my Facebook timeline has been flooded with puffy white wedding gowns and cute chubby newborns lately, a portion of my dearest friends (both ladies and gents) are a long way from settling down anytime soon. I say this with confidence because they’re either single and really fed up with mingling or they’re dating someone casually who they would never dream of introducing to the parents.

So you see they’ve settled too, in their own way, either by convincing themselves that they should not bother searching for their Soul Mate anymore, that cuddling is totally overrated and they’re saving their energy for their careers or by pursuing a relationship with a guy/girl who blurts cryptic things like “Marriage is just something society created to organize people”

I’m not going to give you a speech on why you shouldn’t give up ( although you shouldn’t) or reassure you that there is that right person for you out there (I’m a hopeless romantic) I’m just going to share with you a brief list of how you could be enabling yourself from failing to find the right person for you.

1)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by being a bitter pissed off person all the time, going on unwarranted rants online and being generally unkind and rude to others just because you want to come off as strong and invincible. It’s just not attractive.

2)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by carrying excessive baggage from your past breakups and being paranoid and suspicious because you never want to get hurt again so you go on labeling the opposite sex as “cheaters” or “opportunists” and make wild declarations like “I don’t believe in love” to every guy/girl you meet.

3)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by staying in your comfort zone through randomly hooking up with every single guy/girl who’s emotionally unavailable too or by agreeing to an open relationship because you’re scared he/she might leave you otherwise.

4)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by creating all these preposterous credentials you require in a partner before you would even consider dating them like, religion, social status, bank account, height.

5)      You’re not going to find your soul mate by seeking your parent’s approval because no one is truly good enough for you. Or by purposely pursuing someone who lives abroad because you know they’re going to leave eventually.

6)     Speaking of no one is truly good enough for you, I hope you don’t really believe those prep talks. Sure you’re great- in some ways- but you probably have a long list of vices that your better half will have to put up with as well. So take it easy with the whole “no one deserves me” attitude.

6)      You’re not going to find your soul mate because you can’t afford to throw a wedding extravaganza and don’t think anyone will settle for anything less.

7)      And you most definitely will not find your soul mate if you keep posting silly quotes like “I’m single and free and it’s just me ”

All this is not to say that being single isn’t one of the most amazing crucial independent phases in a person’s life, a time where you can create some of the strongest bonds and make the most amazing memories with friends. But just like staying in college for too long, the fun eventually fades. And I am fully aware that not all of us want the same things out of life; like a beautiful house and bouncy babies. I’m just trying to say that maybe you haven’t found your soul mate because maybe just maybe you’ve inadvertently done everything not to be found.

Thoughts?

Also See

8 Reasons Why Arab Men Won’t Marry You

6 Reasons Why He Didn’t Call You Back

What Men Really Want- Especially Lebanese Men

5 Reasons You’re Still Single; The Arab Men Edition-Part I

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits Of Middle Eastern Men

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Women

 

 

 

 

The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Women

jasmine

You loved The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Men, and since I’m all for equality this sequel was only fair.

1)      When you first met her at a club she seemed like the most outgoing fun-loving party girl who wanted to grab life by its horns.  She made Lindsay Lohan look like a homebody. Fast forward to two dates later and she’s dropping the “M Bomb” on you. Yes, already. She brought up marriage so casually, practically implying it’s a condition. At this point you’re completely oblivious to the trap she just set for you. You would have agreed to anything just to get some . Now you’re about to drop a hefty down payment for that 700 plus wedding, jokes on you! Muhahahaha

2)      Excessive complaining followed by a chance of tantrum. Just like Australia is known for its Kangaroos, we Middle Eastern women are known for our soap opera-like tantrums when things don’t go our way. As a rule of thumb, NEVER attempt to win an argument; you will be annihilated for the mere act of trying.  And when all else fails- we’ll call in the tears. As soon as you spot them apologize IMMEDIATELY. If you’re not sure apologize anyway.

3)      Zero notion of Time. Fake lash application is more complicated and meticulous than you know. (anyone else can’t get than hang of it?) So If you need to be somewhere at 10pm just subtract that number by 3. So 7pm means 10pm.  2 mean 5. Simple math and no one’s late. I love win wins.

4)      Drama, we live for it, attract it, crave it, create it, and when all else fails, imagine it. Even if it’s a perfectly nice day and you’re having a stroll in her favourite mall, drama still lurks in the shadows. It could her over-protective mother barraging her with calls inquiring about her whereabouts or some random girl shop girl giving her attitude. They ruined her mood and now you and that unsuspecting waitress are going to pay. Brace yourself, put on your headgear and get ready to roll with the punches . Nod and agree (and nod) with everything she says and pray for the shit storm to pass.

5)      Part of what makes you a gentleman is your ability to finance everything. If you don’t then you’re either cheap or poor and both won’t do.  It’s pretty straight forward

6)      No you can not be friends with your ex-girlfriend or any other female friend for that matter even if she’s married with kids. It’s a territorial thing. And all your male friends need to pass a screen test where she will filter them out and decide which ones will do and which will not. No you do not get to have a say.

Did I miss a few?

Also See

What Men Really Want, Especially Lebanese Men

Mes Obsessions Du Jour

IMG_1378bfc broadway lipstickIMG_0187metropole brasserie Lobster quinoaIMG_1316mandaloun cafeIMG_1696christmas day one outfitIMG_1277brgr co, lebanon sloppy joeIMG_1165Les Merveilleuses Laduréecover fixed high resragmag mona  about hamzeIMG_1311pauls tourte aux 3 fromagesIMG_1001starbucks Toffee Nut LatteIMG_1014adidas sonic boostFollow Ivy Says on Instagram here

instagram

Join the Fight Against Tattooed Eyebrows

eyebrows

Alright. So I’m about to acknowledge the elephant in the country. Someone’s gotta do it already, and I’m taking one for the team.

Two words: Tattooed Eyebrows. We all breathed a sigh of relief as we bid farewell to decades of notoriously pin-thin over-plucked half-moons, little did we know we’d only be paving the way for these jumbo eye-staches? When did it suddenly become cool to have creepy caterpillars on your forehead? Dark, moist, ridiculously thick and worst of all, supernaturally defined and straight substitutes or deformed arches of what was once, hair.

I must have missed the memo, you know the one that incited these poor unsuspecting women to go out in flocks, shave off their eyebrows and replace them with absurd PERMANENTLY tattooed marks on their heads. I woke up one day and everywhere I looked there they were, red ones, gray ones, brownish-orange ones, and very very black ones. The Horror.

No tattooed eyebrows do not look natural. No matter how many times you ask or what ridiculous sum of money you paid for them. No matter what that beautician told you. They just don’t. And they never will. You’ve been punk’d.

Besides, the point of recreating a look is to emulate something that actually exists in the first place. I promise you, the last women that probably sported those things were living in caves and even they felt insecure about them when they discovered the mirror.

And what about when they peel ( yes, those things peel!) if it were up to me, it should be illegal for women to go out in public when they’re freshly inked and their new creatures are covered with this nasty coat of gunk.

I thought long and hard before writing this post. Because I thought of all the women that got them. That’s a lot of women to piss off. But you know what, they should have listened. They had done no justice to their once beautiful faces. You may tell me my opinion is uncalled for. Perhaps.

But there’s one thing I’m sure of, Tattooed eyebrows should be criminalized, if not for the women who wear them then at least think of the  people who have to withstand the pain of looking at them. Because we all know that when you’re speaking to someone with tattooed eyebrows, you can’t look anywhere else but at those things. It’s all you can focus on. And you get caught so many times doing it. And you try and try to look away but you end up staring right at them the entire time.

So ladies, enough is enough, you can fight this, resist the urge to go in for that retouch session, let them go , and in a year or two,  they will fade away like a far distant memory. And if you’re lucky no one will remember that you had the same facial expression for an entire year.

Sign the petition today by leaving your name in the comment section below!

Mes Obsessions Du Jour

IMG_7011pars charmsIMG_6757urbanistaIMG_7730moschino caseIMG_6604loubiesIMG_7822roman gelatoIMG_6599galaxy s4 miniIMG_7940montreal mini burgersIMG_7536marc by marc jacobs coco colaIMG_7474Havaianas sneakersIMG_5927oslo angel cakeIMG_7612Zara Statement NecklaceFollow me on Instagram here

instagram

MTV Video Music Awards 2013: Best Dressed

There were so many disastrous frocks at the 2013 MTV’s Video Music Awards. So so many. And then there was the trainwreck Miley Cyrus who committed every crime against fashion and her dignity that even Helena Bonham Carter was probably shaking her head in disdain somewhere.

So instead of getting nasty I’m going to share with you my choice of best dressed because there were a couple of fabulous gowns that really deserve the recognition.

2013 MTV Video Music Awards - Arrivals

First up is Selena Gomez in this show-stopping Atelier Versace fall 2013 creation. I can’t begin to describe my complete infatuation with this number and how well she wore it although I still view Selena as this younger Disney princess-type. She took this entire look right off the runway including those amazing shoes. I absolutely adore the bustier, the detail and the color. Best dressed hands down!

ciara givenchy

Ciara looked picture perfect in this piece of art couture by Givenchy. The intricate embroidery looks like it’s been sculptured right on to  her body and the feathers at the bottom give it an ethereal feel.  Pure perfection from head to toe.

Holland Roden

I have no idea who Holland Roden is but let me tell you she is now on my style radar. I LOVED this daring ivory Naeem Khan pants-dress combo. Not many can pull off this look but she did so well with her gelled back hair and the crimson lips were the perfect final touch.

allison-williams-en-valentino-aux-mtv-vma

I’ve always been big on long-sleeved dresses ever since Angelina Jolie stunned in that green Atelier Versace … so Girls actress Alison Williams comes in fourth for me in this ivory Valentino Fall 2013 long sleeved, high collared lace dress. She unusually paired it with those Christian Louboutins heels that actually work.

taylor swift in Herve Leger

Ok I love Hervé Léger, so does every girl in the world. And then there’s Hervé Léger and Max Azria. Let me tell you, not many women can pull of this look, and your bust and hips really need to be proportional to be able to fit into this nicely. Taylor Swift’s been blessed with never-ending legs and a tiny frame so although she wears it really well, it’s still a pretty safe bet. I’d love to  see Sofía Vergara’s hour glass rocking this one.

Taylor’s old-hollywood hair and red lip pairing look great but slightly too made up, I would rather see her hair with tousled casual waves.

Want more Red Carpet hits and misses? Check them out HERE