Tag Archives: relationships

Ask Ivy: Should Marriage Come Next?

ask ivyThis week on my Ask Ivy Column on Beirut.com I discuss an issue I know many ladies may be going through at some point in their lives.

Picture this, you’re in a steady relationship, things are going great, you love your man but that’s it. Suddenly you’re asking what’s next and he’s acting like you just betrayed the “agreement” you had, whatever that was. In fact he’s even disappointed you asked. So before you overreact click here to read my advice…

Many of us grow up believing we’re attracted to bad boys. But what happens when your girlfriend is dating one of the biggest jerks around. Do you stand back and watch it all go down or take matters into your own hands? Here’s what I think

You can email all your questions to tell.ivy@gmail.com

Ivysays Bisoux

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Sex And Burgers Are More Alike Than You May Think

ask ivyOn my relationship advice column on Beirut.com this week, I get asked two very interesting questions:

Dear Ivy,
My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. I’m 28 and he’s 30. Recently, I decided to talk to him about our general lack of sex. He said that I turn him on, but he just doesn’t get horny that much because he’s spent so much time in the past watching porn (he’s given up porn for a few months now) and also, he said he gets self-conscious about finishing too quickly. I’m sexually frustrated and for some reason a part of me doesn’t believe him! But I don’t want to accuse him of lying after he’s opened up to me. What should I do?

Dear Ivy,
I caught my boyfriend looking at pictures of his ex-girlfriend on Facebook. I confronted him about it, and he admitted he looks at her photos every once in a while, but says it’s because he’s being a Facebook voyeur – just looking – but that it doesn’t actually mean anything to him. What do you think, Ivy?

What do burgers have to do with your sex life and why your man is facestalking his ex? Find out HERE


Dear Ivy, My Family Thinks My Boyfriend is “Cheap”

On my relationship advice column on Beirut.com this week, I get asked a very interesting question which has got a lot of people talking. Many couples here find themselves in the same boat and well it just goes to show how messed up the general outlook is. If your man doesn’t have a 3 bedroom apartment with a sea view, a slick ride and cash to burn (no matter how indebted he may be) then he’ll be casted out by those closest to you as cheap or unworthy.

Dear Ivy,

I’ve been dating a guy for about 4 months now. He’s 27, I’m 25. He’s pretty much broke all the time, but that’s because he’s self-sufficient, lives on his own and pays all the bills, and has a low-salary job. It doesn’t bother me, but everyone in my family is constantly putting him down and calling him “cheap.” Advice?

Click Here to read my take on the matter. Do you agree?

ask ivy


This Week On Ask Ivy’s Advice Column

Dear Ivy,

Call me old-fashioned, but I want to stay a virgin until I’m married. Now that I’m getting older, I feel like this might get in the way of dating. What if I’m interested in someone and he doesn’t want to wait? Or should I just not be interested in him to begin with?

-Not That Prude

To read my advice  you can visit my weekly column at  Beirut.com by clicking here

Got relationship issues, shoot me your questions at tell.ivy@gmail.com

ask ivy

The Crazy Girlfriend- A Series of Disturbing Events

Some people take longer than others to find their soul mates. It happens. Heck some people search their whole lives. No one is immune to loneliness. But sometimes loneliness can make people do some strange things. Add some raging hormones to that mix and you’ve got yourself one desperate individual.

Her name is Hoda and she always does the same mistake with every guy she meets: she comes off way too strong. She once invited a guy she started seeing for two months to the Maldives. She tried to trick him into going with him as just “friends.” She broke the news to him after two bottles of wine. He impulsively agreed at first. But the next day he came to his senses, the thought of traveling with a girl he barely knew to a honeymoon destination freaked him out. Naturally.

She wouldn’t have any of it. She guilted him into it by claiming she had already put down a payment. He reluctantly agreed but was so weirded out by her insistence, he tried to avoid her for the two weeks ahead of the trip. She didn’t care. As long as she had him to herself for an entire 10 days in a secluded place, she would let him have his freedom.

In a frantic attempt a week before the trip he told her he had just realized his passport had expired. She had a meltdown. He wanted to run as far far away he couldn’t. It was too late. She reassured him once again that this was casual trip between two friends. He succumbed.  Little did he know how much lingerie shopping she was doing.

She bragged to friends about her new man and how he was “already” spoiling her with a trip.  The people that knew of her history felt bad for him.

So off they went, she tried to hang on to his arm the entire time but he kept trying to avoid her grip.  He was shocked to find out she had gone ahead and booked the honeymoon package for the both of them claiming it was “cheaper.” Rose petals and a swan-shaped towel on an over-sized king bed. He was stuck.

He didn’t touch her the entire trip. He just couldn’t. She took hundreds of pictures to post on Facebook on an album that looked like two lovers on a romantic getaway. He untagged himself in all of them. She tried to get him to drink and relax but he was on his guard. Something didn’t feel right. Her emotional neediness had taken a toll on him and he couldn’t wait to get back to Beirut. He broke things off the as soon as they arrived. She still tried to creep her way into his life but he couldn’t handle more of her so he went ahead and ignored her calls. She went around down badmouthing him to common friends. Now he was labelled as the Ahole that “took what he wanted” and bounced.

She’s back at it again now in search of the next sucker she will make her pretend boyfriend.

desperate girlfriend

More on The Crazy Girlfriend Series here

Ask Ivy: The Hottest Weekly Advice Column on Beirut.com

I’m very proud to announce my latest collaboration with Beirut-dot-com ASK IVY!

Each Wednesday I will have my very own advice column on Beirut.com where I will be answering all your questions on love, dating, relationships and any other dirty little thought in your head. No questions are off-limits and you don’t have to reveal your identity so feel free to throw any of your most intimate and even embarrassing topics my way at tell.ivy@gmail.com.

From Boyfriends, Condoms and Creepy Stalkers to Spicing Up Relationships Gone Stale, Bad Breakups and Super Clingy Boyfriends, take a minute to check out this week’s Ask Ivy Column  at Beirut.com

Nosy Lebanon- Please Refrain

One thing  I  can do without in Lebanon:  The constant probing. The entitlement some people feel, to ask you some downright intrusive questions, questions that may be too personal even for US airport security, I kid you not. The problem is with the way these questions sneak up on you, when you least expect them, BOOM, they come right at you, and you stand there, feeling violated, with  no choice but to answer something you just couldn’t imagine sharing with that person. One minute you’re getting your hair washed, before you know it,  you’re telling the hairdresser how much you pay for rent a month and your parents don’t mind that you live alone. WTF?

Scenario One:

I am at  Gloria Jeans Café in Hamra, paying for my coffee. Continue reading

If A Man Could Have Them All, Would He Settle For Just One Woman?

Rani will sleep with anything that walks. He has a weakness for the ladies and he’s not ashamed to hide it. He doesn’t have a type, but the flashiest girl in the room usually gets Shotgun. Blondes usually do the trick. He’s not dreamy, he’s good looking, smart yet goofy. He’s the loudest in the room and his laugh is contagious. He usually travels with hot wing-woman; he believes it makes him more approachable. It does.

Rani’s never been in love- although he thinks he has. Most of those girls were in serious relationships. His friends have tried to tell him, it’s not them he’s in love with, but the fact they’re unattainable. He doesn’t get it.  Every girl Rani can’t get Rani wants.

He’s had some very close calls. They’ve all started off as physical flings. When he finds a girl that is both hot and makes him laugh he’ll have dinner with her. She’ll think they’re dating and he’ll play along, until something better comes along.

Rani’s not a mean guy. He’s actually really nice. He’s confused. Although, he secretly feels like a player, he’ll always deny it. He just feels like a kid in a candy store, and doesn’t understand why he has to choose. He’s not particularly rich, at least that’s not how he gets girls. He’s really funny.

Girls fall in love with him but he leaves a bitter taste in their mouth.

I’m convinced that even the biggest and baddest of players want to be loved. They may not have the will to remain monogamous but they too strive for a relationship, where they can kick back and be themselves. To be with a girl who can throw back some beers, a girl that gets along with “the guys” and a girl that he can cuddle with while watching the Animal Planet. The players that deny this just haven’t found the right one yet.

I can be wrong. Maybe there are some men out there who just don’t wanna settle, those who don’t need to buy the entire cow to enjoy some fresh milk. What do you think? Bisoux

He’s Muslim; She’s Christian, All They Need Is Love, Right! Right?…?…?

Maya and Karim were inseparable. They were just one of those couples that we were sure would never break up. And then without warning- they break up and he gets engaged, to a girl from his own religion.

Typical right? Maya the Christian girl from Jbeil and Karim the Muslim guy from Beirut.  We’ve all heard this story many many times. But when it happens to one of your closest friends, you really start to rethink things.

He called her his “wifey” all the time.  Not once- would you ever look at these two and think they’re “different”- because, well, they just weren’t.  I wouldn’t say they practiced religion, but occasionally Maya would go to a mass with her parents and Karim would fast a few days in Ramadan.

They’re relationship was an intimate one. Both couple’s parents knew about it. There were rumors that Maya’s parents weren’t exactly happy, but they knew they couldn’t do anything about it. Karim’s parents on the other hand, always welcomed Maya, and Maya felt right at home with them.

After 4 years going strong, they both wanted more. So they decided they would do what any interfaith Lebanese couple would have to do, a civil marriage in Cyprus. That’s when things started to go wrong. Maya’s mother was heartbroken; she vowed that Maya would “regret” never walking down the aisle. Karim’s parents seemed OK with it all, until they mentioned a small religious ceremony (Katb Al Kitab) upon the couple’s return from Cyprus. “Just for formalities” his dad kept saying.

And that’s when shit hit the fan. Maya felt betrayed that Karim had bought into his dad’s suggestion. When Maya’s parents got word of this, they freaked out. And with communication down the drain, the couple took some “time-off.”  One minute we’re shopping for a “silky simple off-white dress” the next Maya’s lying on her bedroom floor crying her heart out.

The girls and I kept trying to explain to Maya that all this shouldn’t matter, what matters is that she loves Karim and they should do what they have to do to make it work. My boyfriend called me such a hopeless romantic, “things don’t work that way”, he kept saying.

Indeed they don’t. Karim felt just as betrayed that Maya wouldn’t do such a “small formality” to be with him. Both parents convinced them they were better off without each other.  And today, a month later, Kairm’s Facebook status changed to “Engaged.”

For once, I’m completely out of words. Bisoux