Ivy says » Tabloid Trash

Maya Diab-Fashion’s New Muse or TV Reckloose?

Ivy — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 12:04:14 +0000

Did you ever want to stop that over-the-top dressed housewife at the supermarket and explain to her that just because Maya Diab’s turned herself into a living/breathing anime wonder it doesn’t mean that she too can dress up in leather suspenders and spike-studded oversized shoulder pads just to pick up some kebbeh?

Maya Diab’s is all about making a fashion statement and pushing the boundaries, and yes, sure, she’s positioned herself as a household name, landing herself some hefty endorsement deals. She takes good pictures, but the woman refuses to change that look on her face, the squinting eyes and over-pouting lips. She always poses like she’s posing and don’t even get me started on the way she handles herself on television. Had she at least tried to keep things subtle she may not be as ridiculed as she is today. To be fair her favourite designer Nicolas Jebran is a VERY talented designer. Now if only the two of them can work on the concept less is more.

Here are some of Maya’s most memorable looks. What do you say, HIT or MISS?

Lebanese Singer Channels Her Inner Britney

Ivy — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 10:22:17 +0000

You know the Lebanese Music Industry has reached rock bottom when an 80’s has-been who goes by the name of Clauda Chemali (ask your moms about her) makes a come-back by advertently recycling and downright copying direct scenes from Britney Spears Toxic Video- and calls the song- get this-“Bowsa Qatoulieh”- meaning- “Toxic Kiss” firstly thinking she can pull it off (shudder) and more importantly thinking this would go by unnoticed?!

What makes this even worse: The song is a HIT! Yes, if you could get yourself to tune into a cheese factory Arabic music channel for more than five minutes (I was at the dentist’s waiting room, I swear) you would most likely be exposed to this truly toxic song. She even has Robots dancing dabkeh while she performs.

I’ve gone ahead and taken some snapshots with my phone, I couldn’t believe my eyes. What planet do we live on?

and now for the video

Do You Really Want Her ‘Meow’?

Ivy — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 12:23:03 +0000

Her name is Nancy Afiouny and she’s pretty confident that you want her meow. In case you were still feeling doubtful about going for it she made this video to seal the deal.

Nancy ran for the Miss Lebanon crown but lost in 2003 and her hometown is Tripoli. It seems that this once simple student majoring in Economics at the Lebanese University woke up one day and said to herself “to hell with this Econ101 demand vs. supply crap! I’ll tell you what sells, MY MEOW sells!”
So she transformed from this

To this full out Purring MEOWW, Move Over Lady Gaga, Afiouny’s In Da House Now!

Check It Out…

YES, you DID hear correctly some of her classy lyrics include:

“You wanna rip him of me, got plans for my body, you wanna turn me over, right here on this frying pan, we’re up against the wall, and then we said hello. Baby I got you all excited just thinking about, the way I let your fire go on and put it out, if I was down I bet you’d take it right here right now (AWW) you want MY MEOW MEOW, GET DOWN GET DOWN”

Hit or Miss?

Ivy — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 18:29:43 +0000

Yes those are actually 3D aluminum pipe-shaped objects attached to Maya Diab’s dress. I was worried she’d stab herself in the arm as she was dancing at one point. So what do you say genius or has this lady finally lost it? You decide…

Lebanese Wife Of Hannibal, The Libyan Dictator’s Son

Ivy — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 10:44:29 +0000

When daddy’s one of the biggest baddest dictators around-you know your gonna be living large and that’s exactly what Ghaddafi’s son Hannibal 36, and Lebanese wife from Akkar, Aline Skaff 31, (who was the first lady to appear semi-topless on a Lebanese publication) did!

Those two sure looked like they were having a good time in the photos that had just surfaced showing the couple flying on a private jet, bathing on luxury yachts on trips to Paris, Rome and Sharm el-Sheikh.

Sure an estimated 1/3 of Libyan’s live below the poverty line, that didn’t keep them from their superzealous globe-trotting affairs. Now, even though these photos paint an image of loving marital relationship, don’t be fooled, Libya and Switzerland experienced serious diplomatic tensions when Hannibal once beat Aline up until she fainted while in a hotel in Switzerland six years ago when she was pregnant. Thanks Aline, this will surely should bring about the right kinda tourism to Lebanon this year

Goodbye 4 Cats, Hello Cheeta

Ivy — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 08:46:59 +0000

Her name is Maya Diab and she has a show on the Lebanese Mtv called “ Hek Minghani” (This is how we sing).

Many of you may remember Maya from her all-girl band days with the 4 Cats (yes, you read that correctly, cats, as in felines). I’m not sure when her current show comes on but I’ve caught a glimpse of it once or twice as I was randomly flipping through some channels. It was one of those things that are so irritating but you just can’t get yourself to stop watching because you can’t believe what you see, better yet, a friend tells me the show is a big hit!

Maya, the host, invites artists onto her show and they start having singing competitions. Now all that is great, until you realize that the guest artists there are just stage props, they could be singing “Hal Seesan Shou Hilween” for all everyone cares, no one would even flinch an eye, this show is simply a set-up for the super vain Maya Diab to strut her stuff in front of the camera the entire time. We all have moments of vanity but I’ve never seen anyone more in love with the camera in my life. The woman will literally start following it around until it focuses on her and then she’ll start over-performing until it becomes too painful but really funny to watch. And don’t get me started on her outfits, my jaw just drops with each outfit choice she makes. If I were her I’d have a long one-on-one “talk” with the show’s stylist. Can you imagine what a field day the Fashion Police would have if they got wind of this? What do you think?

A Message to Skinny Girls

Ivy — Tue, 20 Sep 2011 06:42:58 +0000

Miss Lebanon At Miss Universe 2011

Ivy — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 14:41:08 +0000

So much for fighting stereotypes. Has anyone bothered to look at Miss Lebanon Yara Khoury Mikhael’s promo shots for Miss Universe 2011? Was it really necessary that she represents this country wearing a tacky leaving-nothing-to-the-imagination bellydancing outfit? *To be fair, the stylist made all the contestants dress in similar outfits so we know it wasn’t her pick* Still though, blame the Trump people or organizers if you may, but the next time I’m asked by a foreigner if I belly dance because I’m from Lebanon what am I supposed to say? They’re right to think so.. take a look

Dumbledore the wizard called , he’s furious you stole his outfit.

When SuperGirl Came To Lebanon…

Ivy — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 12:48:40 +0000

Autostrade Adventures

Ivy — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 11:59:17 +0000

For all we know, this guy may as well have killed his boss, threw him in a plastic bag and dragged him with his mobilette on the highway because no one seemed to look twice at this sight! Fine, he may just be picking up his boss’s suit from the dry cleaners but seriously, talk about being resourceful.

Dry Cleaning LL,15,000 LL

Gas for Mobilette LL20,000LL

Taking the time to crack a smile while dragging your boss’s clean suit on the highway: PRICELESS