I think I know how a stuffed turkey feels. I ate enough to feed an entire village in Africa this Christmas. Not to mention the amount of wine I consumed, red Ksara, white Blanc de Blanc, pink Myst, my kidneys were putting in extra hours. I need to hibernate until my body can resume regular functioning again but I thought I’d just pop in to give you brief update on my encounter with Rony. He wasn’t as tall as I hoped but he certainly provided me with a much needed dose of eye-candy for the holidays. We hit it off right away. He loved the Santa’s Helper apron and I strategically wore a Santa hat, just in case he forgot who he should be reporting to. At some point he became my official wine pourer, making sure my glass was always half full. I love me some optimism. He was one of those guys that made you feel like you were the only girl in the room. Rony and I were on the road to sheer happiness until the giraffe walked in and pissed on my parade. Standing next to me her legs made mine look like a grain of rice next to a strand of spaghetti and I’m considered tall! She gave me an icy narrow-eyed look as Rony introduced us to each other. Her name was Pamela and she was an “old friend” of his. The three of us shared an awkward moment of silence so I decided to break the ice by grabbing Rony’s glass and told him I’ll be back with some more wine. I quickly scanned the room for Mia and cornered her for a quick update. Mia was excited that I had hit it off with Rony and asked me to stick around until the guests leave so that I could hang out with her boyfriend and Rony. I was trotting back to my little helper but I couldn’t find him at the spot were I last left him. The wine glasses were making my hands cold so I headed to the kitchen to fetch some napkins. I opened the flapping door only to find two people seriously engaged in a make out session. They both stopped doing what they were doing and turned around to find me standing there. It was none other than Rony and the giraffe. I awkwardly apologized and scurried out of the kitchen, almost hitting my head on the still flapping doors. I had only met Rony for two hours but I felt hurt. I grabbed my coat and made a run for the exit. I felt kinda silly for being so annoyed but I could have sworn I felt something between us. Just as I was getting into my car I got a text message. “Where are you? It’s Rony btw.” Yeah right, Rony was out of his mind if he thought I would get myself tangled up in his issues with his “old friend.” And I didn’t even remember giving him my number. I obviously ignored his message and drove to my mom’s house. She heated a nice bowl of “shourbet 3adas” for me and I told her about my night. She agreed that Rony was “bad news” and poured me some more soup. I tried to resist but she insisted. That’s what I love about my momma; food is always the best remedy so eat up!
